now here is nowhere

breathe

2005-11-17T22:51:00.000+08:00

anna nalick - breathe

mm some interesting stuff happened this week.

monday, went to school to help loo out in clearing out the gep resource room. arranged, filed, labelled, cleaned out and organised the entire monther tongue section of teachers resources.. >.< quite fun actually.

then after that we went holland V for lunch. loo treated us to crystal jade.. o.0 treated 6 people leh.. so nice.

felt quite bad actually, coz she paid for everything and insisted on it. but nevermind. 5 years later, we will meet at the same restaurant and at the same seat, and treat her instead.. =)

then tuesday went with song to bras besar.. went to art friends to find materials for his top secret art project. found all the stuff we needed and then headed to josh's house to contruct it. it turned out very well in fact. i bet she'll be so touched by it, she'll cry. i just know it.

stayed over at josh's house too. spent most of the time playing some songs (whee) and on the com lanning little fighters. lol. yea thanx josh for letting us stay over..

sigh. i dun understand what the fuss is all about harry potter and claims of it being satanic.

i mean honestly - its just a book and all.

ok, so it does have magic, but its fiction, and completely made-believe. the reason why wicca and witchcraft is satanic in the first place is because it places demonic powers over God. but the kind of magic in HP is more fantasyish than actual wiccan practice.

and why is it just harry potter specifically? magic has been around in fiction long before JK rowling came along. i mean, nobody is claiming that Gandalf is corrupting their kids or anything. >.<

i personally think its just a whole lot of hype, because its famous and all.

what happened to the wondrous world of make-believe in children's fiction? are kids even allowed to have an imagination these days? just becuase they describe fictatious magic, it is evil and perverting our children?

either way. harry potter is definitely much better than alot of other stuff kids can access these days. think about the pornography and violence and racism and sex and discrimination and blood. shouldnt people be worrying about other more important things rather than HP?

living a proper Christian life is already so hard to begin with - you dont have an exact answer as to how much of something is right or wrong. i know some people will say that its better to err on the safe side. but.. i just dont think avoiding everything is the right answer though. you know?

no, of course you dont know.

nevermind. just feeling particularly frustrated today, hence the rant.

i dont usually do this.

i dont even give a shit about harry potter or its movie. i just want to get out of the house and entertain myself with moving pictures for a good 90 minutes.

sigh.

the only living boy in nyc

2005-11-12T00:46:00.000+08:00

okok. im NOT in nyc. but thats hardly the point here. im talking about the awesome power of simon and garfunkle.

say it out loud with mr.

SIMON AND GARFUNKLE.

GARFUNKLE.

GARFUNKLE!

sorry.

anyways. i have decided to resuscitate my dead blog, in the metaphorical sense. too lazy to blog lah.

too ashamed to blog too, because every blog post will be exceedingly similar.

"today i went out and watched the movie __________ then went to eat/play pool"

i have watched sky high (a second time), just like heaven (today), oliver twist (also today), and erm. probably some others but i cant remember.
(flightplan? hmm.. no that was quite a while back..)

yea. and there was also last sunday and monday where we had the class bbq chalet thing. lol it was fun!
i was introduced to the awesome addictive power of dance dance revolution. its darn fun after you get the hang of it. i also ownzor at the pogo stick.
i think my true calling is hopping on a spring to flashing arrows.

and tuesday too, where i went swimming with a friend.

and thursday, where we went jamming. damn fun! =D
and then went to josh's house where we messed around.. lol. if you see me online, ask for the secret song! you will be much amused haha.

and today. watched a movie, went out to eat, and then watched another movie. wahlau!

bottomline, i am freakin broke!

i am so guilty for spending so much cash. from now on, no more movies. except for harry potter, and pride and prejudice (WHOA KEIRA KNIGHTLEY). lol.

the more i think about it, movies are actually really evil. they cost a bomb for just 2 hours of flashing pictures.. >.<
some arent even nice flashing pictures to begin with.

but lots of people watch movies anyway, becasue they're so evily convenient. think about it! you just have to buy tickets and get there on time. most people use movies as an excuse to meet up with friends anyway, since there's nothing else to do in orchard.

learn to ph34r hollywood.

anyway. really nothing meaningful to blog about. other than my apprehensions about next year. dont need to describe it. we all know it ourselves.

all other meaningful, thought-worthy stuff have been forgotten.

oh yeah. colin is a confirmed clasmate! awesome alliteration indeed!

lie in the sound

2005-10-29T00:17:00.000+08:00

havent blogged in.. 11 days.

quite a lot happened in this 1+ week. like the release of results, and the long period of going to school and going out after that. either way, none of it was really very interesting or thought provoking, so didnt blog in the end.. (psst. i was lazy)

then we got our classes today. i didnt go to school btw, so i only found out after frantic msn convos and talking on the phone.

so tada. im in 5.13 ecclesiastes.

with song and mingyi and brandon too. so i wont be terribly alone.

strangely though, lots of people have expressed sympathy for me being in the same class as brandon, which i found very amusing. i jsut dont see whats the probem.
brandon's perfectly alright without hasslers to hound him.

what's more interesting to look out for next year, are how some people are going to survive without their political lackeys.

alright. no more cynical swipes.

so anyway. new classes next year were a big enough prompt for me to get off my lazy ass and write something about it.

i guess i was kinda worried about classes next year. about not getting my subject combi and getting into a class of complete anti-gep strangers. fortunately, ive got my HL lang (which after finals was in precarious jeopardy), my gep companions and (according to song) a relatively good class.

and for an extra bonus, the CT is tankhengsin, the educator. which is cool coz he already knows me.

gosh.

the truth does have the habit of settling at the very last moment doesnt it. i was moping around in school waiting for this school year to end, when the next school year had just started to begin.

i think being stuck in the same class for 2 years made us take things for granted. 1 year without the usual panic of starting afresh, and now its finally hit us.

think about it. no more 4.9 elijah. no more gepers-united. no more groups of great friends. theres still the we'll-keep-in-touch thing, but it'll never be the same.

thats it. more reminiscing and ill have to cry myself to sleep listening to Graduation by vitamin C.

=(

but oh well. the 2 years spent together as friends, classmates, hOMies or the like just means double the strength in friendship. (double bonds=hard to break)

new year = new challenges. stuff are definitely going to be more interesting, so more fun for me.

2005 was a damn great year. now to see if 2006 will be better. bring it on!

sidewalks

2005-10-18T21:21:00.000+08:00

story of the year - sidewalks

w00t. what an incredibly dumb day.

stupid waste of time in school. should have ponned..

did like 2 surveys. both were equally dumb.. "do you love your school" and other variations.

then the colloquiem. (yea yea i know i spelt it wrong. but its just a damn blogpost), which was really really dumb. "manifesto".. i mean it sounded cool at first.. but it just seemed to me like some lame school unity thing. i lost all interest after the presentation. sorry >.<

then a very interesting time in class. stayed for a while in 4.10, coz the whole class was busy playing uno - how boring. after that though, had a very interesting conversation.. about pokemon. it was incredibly wrong. DONT ASK.

guitar playing too. and hachi fun lol. show some ya'll to the toitle dude!

then we had to watch some play, dont by the eco-health nurition board thing. stupid lah. i think our OM play owned theirs.. lol..

g0 m4h hOMies!

just got word from song that the average for 4.14's physics is 3.58 (IB point system). its quite comforting in a cathartic sort of way, which also makes it equally disturbing.

sigh. results tomorrow. will i do badly? maybe. does it matter? not really. i'll just see tomorrow.. no point thinking about it now..

i think years of exams have conditioned me to be emotionless about result releasings. the whole its-pointless-feeling-worried-or-depressed-because-itll-all-change-anyway thing. diluting emotions with indifference.. it works surprisingly well.

well. gtg do AEM reflections now..yeyea i know i said that i would do it yesterday in my previous blog entry. i didnt do it in the end.. lol.

cya.

tunnels

2005-10-17T20:09:00.000+08:00

the arcade fire - tunnels

what a surreal song.. lol

could have blogged this morning but was too sianed.. too much to blog lah.. didnt want to type so much.. but here goes anyway..

ok. so exams carried on for the whole of last week. cant really remember much lol.. seems so far away actually. maybe its my subconscious utilising selective amnesia.

exams? what exams?

then after our last paper (geog), went out with mark, toh, song, josh, poh, and hachi while ben soh and joelkhoo tagged along.
ate at swensen's for lunch =D hachi was darn funneh. like when the waitress asked for drink orders..

waitress: sprite, vanilla coke or coffee?
hachi: vanilla coffee!

lolz.

then wandered around paradiz for a long time... remeniscing primary school times with josh and poh.. lol. strange, how we remember quite different things about nanhua. was playing around with hachi's mellifluous also.. lol!
then watched corpse bride, after billpill and mun joined us. nice movie. good stylistics, quite blah plot. lol.

theeen. billpill, ben soh and joel left.. we went harbourfront sakae sushi for dinner.. wah. damn full =D expensive, but it was a after-exam treat for myself..

after that, the whole hoard of us, exept for toh, went to hachi's house. hugeass condo and nice house.. playing with his webcam too..haha.

eeeh. then that was all for the post-exam outing. wanted to do moreee but the group was too big. was fun anyway! hachi was also darn funneh. teasing him quite a bit, which i feel quite bad about.. but no matter. hachi will also be one of my hOMies. lol.

then next day. left for malaysia. o.0 i know. strange right. my parents conveniently told me only the day before, just when i was stepping out of the door to meet my last day of exams.
we were going genting. going with my aunt and cousin. woot. he's like 5 years old and darn cute!

freaking long car ride. finished megatokyo book 1 for the thrid time. slept a lot. shopped for about 2 hours in KL. then drove all the way up to genting.

okok. something you should know. i hate malaysia. and i especially hate genting. its the tackiest cheesiest place on the planet. every-frikin-where there's castle-themed hotels, bright neon signs, dancing bears and whatnot. its like las vegas, in malaysia.. not that im biased against malaysia or malays or anything. but everything is damn slow and inefficient.

ok so. as soon as we get to our room. we dump our stuff and head out to the indoors place. brought my lil sis and cousin to all the kiddy ride stuff. was walking down some stairs when i heard someone shout my name.. lo and behold! it is darren chew!
he was there on holiday with family too. lol. talked abit, then joined back with my family.

eeh. ate, shopped somemore. bought a present for bong (ha!) and went bowling. then went back to hotel room.

next day, went outdoors theme park. rode all the damn rides. boring. nothing eventful happened, except this damn group of teenagers that cut our queue for some ride. my sis got very vulgar.. lol..
theeen.
during lunch. a deaf lady came up to us and wanted to sell pins for 10rm.. to raise funds for some deaf association.. it was a very strange moment.. coz even though i know how to sign the alphabet (there was one phase before the exam where i kept doing the ABC in sign language to lots of poeple.. lol) i coudlnt really talk to her.. i couldnt say i how much of the pins i wanted to buy or what type. i could only smile and point.
then i felt really bad afterwards.. coz so what if i know the damn alphabet in sign language.. i couldnt say hi to her. i couldnt say "im sorry", or "how are you", or "you're so damn brave selling pins to strangers".. i couldnt only show her a 50rm note and point to a pin. sigh.
made up my mind to go take signing classes at the end of the year.. then next year for CIP/CASL can go do volunteer work for the deaf. =) who want to join?

ok then anyway. wacthed sky high in the evening. lame retarded show. but funneh =D

err. nothing else to say? next day was just driving back. finished megatokyo 2 for the third time. read everything i could find. and thats it.
3 out of my 4 marking days went like that..

alright. gtg go do the fucking aem essay. blah.

pain

2005-10-10T20:06:00.000+08:00

jimmy eat world

shit shit shit.

my ipod mini died.

FUCK!

it cant detect any charging at all. i know its not the chargers fault, coz i use firewire for AC charging and USB for com charging, and both dont work.

and then so i try to update the ipod software, thinking i could fix it, but then it got worse.

now it cant even detect the ipod at all, and the ipod's stuck at the "connect to AC screen" (like it should do after you update the software).

i cant carry on with the software update because i have to connect to AC.

and i cant restore fcatory settings (which will most likely fix it) becasue the com cant detect the ipod.

FUCK.

my warranty expired.. last month?

now if i ever want my ipod back, ill have to PAY. which will prob be alot.

or i can just buy a new one. but iPod is how expensive. nano is not worth money. shuffle is err. small.

zen micro has ugly fonts, scrolling and backlight.

zen neeon is expensive too.

SHIT!!!

and tomorrow's math exam too, and i ahvent done anything. shit lah.

writing to reach you

2005-10-09T21:44:00.000+08:00

travis forever.

sigh.

this week of exams can die ah. staying up late to study.. this surge of panic that only hits you the night before exams, making you feel so inadequate for the next paper..

picking up the geog textbook for the first time at 12 midnight the night before the paper is the most lucid memory i have of studying. i think its only because its the most recent.
and staying up til 2 doing 4cons notes.

oh well. the biggest consolation, which isnt really very big at all, is that the muggable subjects are over.

IHS was a load of crap. dumb questions with dumber answers. i think i did ok.

Lang1 was alright i guess. did the poem. didnt write as much as i wanted to. but then again, its not about length..

coremaths 1 was surprisingly manageable. i was expecting to not know a lot of questions and have to resort to harikiri with a pencil. i wont ace it, but i know i wont fail.

physics. ha! ha! omgwtfpwnzedkkthx

lang2 was alright again. did question 3. compared dr.khanna and okonkwo. damn.. during the exam i kept mispelling OKONKWO as OKONKO.

chem was quite.. easy actually. my best? paper yet? at least for paper 1 i did well. anything can happen for paper2, depending on leniency. couldnt balance some equations, couldnt expalin fully certain stuff.

geog. no time. but alright i guess.

and so in 10 hours the next paper begins.
sigh.
at least its just chinese. (ha! never thought id say that)

and then maths and maths and maths. and geog.

shitt. didnt study at all this weekend. think its the absence of muggable topics. it feels as if the exams ended on friday.. went out somemore on friday. watched into the blue. o.0 (preeety)
and then out again for a short while. went to kinokuniya and bought... megatokyo 1 & 2!!
w00ts. my heart just skipped a beat there. <3
and then church after that.
and then today, was intending to study. but got nothing done. gogo me.

aiyah. the rest of the post damn predictable right? "ohnoes! im going to fail!!1!! never mug! will die horrible death!"

actually no lah. not that bad.

its jsut maths. nothing a little practice cant fix.
no sleep too. but nothing a little coffee cant fix either.

dotdot.

remember that feeling of panic that hits you the night before exams?
its here.

fuck.

something to talk about

2005-09-29T19:59:00.000+08:00

badly drawn boy - something to talk about

this song keeps popping into my head now and then whenever i study.. w00t im an audiophile.

anyway. finished chem! =D all the chemical analysis and reactivity series and solubility table is all safely in my head. thats one subject finished, 7 more to go. i guess the trick is not to get intimidated.

didnt go school yesterday. was feeling quite unwell on tuesday already, and i blame my throat infection. so i slept in on wednesdaty, and rested very well.

then went out to serene centre macdonalds to study with victor. w00t! havent seen each other for ages, so we spent more time catching up and talking than studying. but it was great fun anyways.. did integration and trigo stufyf. then slept early.

and today for the first part i was quite hyper, mostly because i rested myself very well the prev day. didnt feel tired all moody at all.. lol.. and was going around signing people the alphabet..hahah. i think i drove deecky nuts.. now he thinks im weird.

and coz i expended all my energy, i was quite lethargic later in the afternoon. lol.

for honours day rehearsal for choir after school. shucks. i think we actually sounded better the week before.. dunno. now we have to stand in a retarded position to sing, and half the melody is cut in the beginning for "solo" parts. and the end is completely ruined by the drama people.
no offence, drama's great. but a reading in the middle of a john rutter piece?! it screams kitsch.
it doesnt help that alistair su is reading: "all things bright and beautiful, all creatures great and small, all things wise and wonderful, the lord God made them all", which is alright except we're in a guys school. how.. gay (for want of a better word).

maybe some of you will go "huh? whats wrong with that?"

which is understandable. but you see, he uses this really dramatic voice, like hes the narrator of a movie trailer. you know what i mean? you can replace the last line with "one ring to rule them all" and it would hardly make a difference.

oh well. choir other than that was a'ight. lol.

well. today im going to finish my Kuno (overdue), fix my POD biblio, and study my maths. ive figured that the best way to get stuff done is not be intimidated.. lol. well, wish me luck. w00t.

be my escape

2005-09-24T22:34:00.000+08:00

reliant k - be my escape

woot. what a nice song. i especially like the parts where you can hear the piano (like the bridge).. i have no idea why though.
seem to like the piano more than the guitar these few days.. playing random pieces, most of them ditties from radio songs... but right now, im learning how to play canon in D without a score.. its great fun, and its the only song i listen to whenever i do POD essays.. even though olly says that song is overrated and should never ever be played. =P

aaaaanyway.

thursday had choir rehearsal with chamber and guitar. nothing intersting happened, except chamber wasnt used to ewan's conducting. she pissed off one guy who couldnt play his violin properly. darn funny... altogether we sounded okish.

and, we ripped the bottom part of the left stage curtains. we smartly pushed the risers all the way to the back, and clipped the curtains to the wall. then we turned the curtain-open switch ON, which caused the curtains to get caught and subsequently tear the bottom portion into shreds with a satisfying RIP sound.
strangely, it was quickly glossed over and rehearsal continued as usual as if nothing happened.

got home, stayed up laaate. did math practice all the way up to 2am til brain hurt. i am self-proclaimed DYDX king.

then friday was a tiring day. woke up exhausted. when thru the daily grind of school, and then went out with fatty, toh, song and jed. watched Brothers Grimm, which i thought was not bad. no idea why the rest thought it sucked..
the fairytale allusions were interesting.. the only part i didnt like was the french and their heavy accent. lols. and the ubiquitous deus ex machinas (i counted 3). then again, it's supposed to be a fairytale, so maybe it was intended?

took the bus, fell asleep and missed my stop. marky was on the same bus and he missed HIS stop.
got home couldnt study anymore and slept.
watching a movie was a big mistake, no?

then today, woke up at 8... went to bukit merah library at aroudn 10 to study. did integration til 11.30, where i got stuck and couldnt continue anymore. ate lunch then went back to study more from 12 til 3. finished half of chem syllabus! w00t.
and i noticed how quiet the library was.. during the first few hours i was listening to the ipod, so i didnt notice. but then the battery was low after lunch, so i didnt use it. thats when i noticed how silent everything was in the library.. quite uncomfortable, coz all of a sudden i was very conscious of the little sounds i was making, like the zipping of a pencil case, the scratching of a pen, or even breathing. lol, im weird.
anyway, after that productive study, ive come to a conclusion that if i was ever stranded in an island alone, i wouldnt be bothered very much.. id love some company, but even if im deprived of all social contact, i wouldnt be that uncomfortable at all.
that conclusion, of course, is the product of my being alone for a long period of time studying and thinking weird thoughts.

after that, cell and church. one of the more interesting cell sessions, coz of the word.
so now its 11. jsut had a very dumb mass convo with niche and a whole lot of other retards.. lol spamming IANIANIAN over and over...

kk. what a long post and kudos for you making this far..

i shall continue to drink cheap cappuccino in a can (POKKA) and stay up late finishing chem.. memorise chemical analysis table and reactivity series!

out!

the district sleeps alone tonight

2005-09-21T18:23:00.000+08:00

what is it with me and songs that have random titles? haha.. ok maybe not "random". what about "poetic"?

anyway. after the last post, where i was clearly passing out from fatigue, i went back to school on thurday. handed up POD, only to find out it wasnt the final duedate after all. %^&@!

then gave friday a miss. was feeling sick and started breaking out. urgh.

the weekend was retarded as well. saturday, song and toh came over. really did nothing. went thru.. one story? then ate and played pool at the clubhouse. friggin lame. played a stupid variation of pool where there was no need to take turns. like using the cue to whack the ball without waiting for the other player, or for the ball to stop. so we were just standing around and violently swinging the cue around at the poor ball over and over.
and then we played one-handed pool which was equally dumb.

then went to grandma's house for dinnner. grandma's birthday. was lame.

then next day went to cousin's house for mooncake festival shit. was lame too.

then monday went over to marky's house to study. managed to do a bit of differentiation.. whee.

and today is wednesday. making ammendments to my POD essay, then will do my damn reflections. then i will attempt to study.

just some thoughts.

this exam period is damn interesting leh. brings out the worst in people.. all the hardcore mugger sides revealing itself. and worse of all, the self-deprecating nonsense about how they'll fail this-and-this.. yea right! =P

sigh. why is the class so overcompetitive??

anyways. been approached by collin's OM group to take part next year. now thats an interesting prospect..
but i feel like im abandoning my prev team members.. and choir too. so maybe i wont take up the offer. then what about iowa 2006? the sense of grit and craziness from om?

eeeeh.'

oh. and ive got a new phone. >.< kept forgetting to blog about it.

there you have it. blah.

wires

2005-09-15T03:08:00.000+08:00

athlete - wires

i have just finished POD...

*collapses*

lights and sounds

2005-09-14T18:18:00.000+08:00

yellowcard - lights and sounds

woot! yellowcard has finished producing their new album!. it wont be released til next year jan, but i got my hands on a pre-release of their new single.. haha.

i find it ironic that i enjoyed school today, only because there were almost no lessons.. actually. there was no lesson at all.

CMaths and AMaths periods were nothing. winhon didnt come.
Physics never happened (has it ever?) jasonchan at reservist.
Chinese was spent telling us about our exam format.
Ditto IHS, though it took only 10 minutes for exam briefing.. then timlim (that slacker) left after that and nothin else happened.
and ISO was a waste of time.
PE was fun. badminton ftw!

and thats it. no proper lesson.

how retarded.

speaking of retarded. look at this.. omg. so dumb.. hahaha.

hmm nothin else worth blogging about.

now to stop procrastinating and start writing about the meaning of my life..

run

2005-09-13T18:45:00.000+08:00

snow patrol - run

teh best song ever.

sigh.. school has started. and everything is back to the same old same.
the same meaningless routine, the same teachers who cant get it right.

and the only thing that seems to have changed is me.

barely anything happened in the hols, but everything seems so different. i wonder why? i cant find answers.. maybe i already have them? sigh.

anyways. been studying after school in the library. with ivan and chrisow. its alright i guess, quite productive. except that i cant stand it whenever they tease me about being a gep. fucking retarded.
but at least im studying. and i need everything to help me get through this final exams.
ive been getting though 3 terms this year, being satisfied with OK results. i thought it was about being contented with results that werent bad.
but when marks came out last term, it kinda hit home when i realised that i shouldnt be satisfied. not with an average of 65.
because i know i can do better, and i have done it before in sec3. its not about being contented with average results, but about doing the best i can.
and it wasnt the best. none of my results were my best.
and i know this term i can. and i will. i know everybody will think im a mugger for starting studying so early. but im going to take it as making up for 3 terms of not doing my best.

sigh.

school today was not really good.
i was feeling really.. down?
except for IHS in the library, which was a laugh. and geog, because it was a really good lesson. and with the OM people too, here and there thruout the day..
other than that, i couldnt stand much of the rest.

was snapping once in while and acting really weird. some people noticed.
i guess i was jsut pissed about things.. was just thinking about stuff in the morning, and the more i dwelled on, the more i got depressed..

its so painful. how im willing to put other people as my number one.. but noone will the other way round. sigh..

i guess the depression hasnt worn off. going to start on my POD essay..

forever lost

2005-09-09T16:58:00.000+08:00

the magic numbers - forever lost

i think ive found my song of the week. lol..

okok. i KNOW i havent blogged in a long time. im posting now on the prompting of ivan to update.. lol. ive been averaging 1 post a week for months now, so ill try to blog more ok? haha.

anyways. this week has been a bummer. holidays suck for the fact that i cant get anything done. not jsut work either. i mean everything. holidays just seem to make me spawn disinterest in everything.

on tuesday, i went for the stupid chinese bao mi hua thing. which was boring beyond boring. it was to the extent that gnawing on my collarbone would have produced more joy. the entire fricking thing stank from beginning to end. we got there 1 hour early coz loo said be there by 8. and it started 9-ish. waste of time, sitting around the lobby of SPH and conspiring how we could escape without getting into trouble. none of our ideas actually transpired because on the dot at 9am, hordes of people streamed in.
the entire place was a freakin congregation of rabid juedui superstar fangirls. AC was the only school there that was completely uninterested in anything that went on. we sat waaay at the back and within 15 minutes, we were playing with our handphones. i cant really remember what else happened that day, it was too boring, except for one image that stuck in my head:
one huge, fat, sweaty girl jumping up and down, thrusting her fist up in the air and screaming "NAN CHIAU IDOL" into the mike. and the evoked response from her peers were screams of euphoric fangirl delight.

*blood shoots out ears*

and the next day went out to watch the longest yard. funny show, great to watch. then played pool. was not bad playing with jed. but then couldnt hit a single thing plating with toh. hai.
then walked to dhoby gaut station, and then back because toh forgot his ezlink.. we left it at the pool place. after that, it was jsut very weird lah. dunnoe why.. maybe i was tired? i jsut felt really awkward.. like usually i dont run out of things to say. i can talk and be funny sometimes, which is normal. but i was jsut quiet and didnt want to talk much.
i am a social retard, no?

then everything else was staying at home and releasing the inner introvert.
staying up late and night online or reading.
read harry potter 2 and 3 and 6 again, back to back. also reread to sir with love, deception point and to kill a mokingbird.
and then yesterday, i watched the parent trap again on vcd. felt like watching it again after looking at the herbie trailer.. lol. made me feel like a kid again..
then kept up with the latest megatokyo.. sigh.

hai. i AM socially retarded! AH!!

black black heart

2005-09-01T17:38:00.000+08:00

david usher song. like the rock remix of the song much better than the original. it somehow masks davidusher's awful voice (hes a songwriter, not a singer).. lol..

spent the entire day mucking around the com and playing the guitar. sianed.

AND ive got POD reflections and an essay to do, which i havent started on. i have absolutely no interest in doing them at all, even though they're due tomorrow. jsut thinking about doing them makes me retch. i absolutely hate superfluous work they assign us, jsut for the sake of assigning us.
especially POD. yuck. why the hell do they grade reflections. i cant even begin to describe how dumb that idea is. putting marks on personal reflections alone undermines its fundamental purpose altogether. its making people think on incentive. analogically similar to making rabbits run by dangling a carrot in front of it. it gets you nowhere, in both manners of speaking.

and essay topics like, "What is the meaning of life".. thats prefectly alright. but with a 1500 word limit?? doesnt anybody know the irony of that?? your answer to the universe and evrything, in an 88kb word document?? i have half a mind to type in my 1.5-spacing-arial-size10 font, the big numerals "42" and leave it as that.
i might even get full marks on the rubric for "organisation"

the brilliant thinkers that are our teachers cant even figure the fundamental problem in our POD syllabus. who teaches philosophy by era?? what does it do? symplify our learning? philosophers in a specific centuries still had different thinkings despite living in the same period of time. conversely, many philosophies carry on thruout many centuries. so whats the point of seperating them into categories of time periods if they dont make sense?
fyi, in university, they teach philosophy by topics and modules. like in one week, they talk about God. then the next they talk about Morals or Love or Friendship or whatever, and what philosohies contributed to ideas in these areas. makes much mroe sense, no? verify with anybody who did philosophy in uni, even in Singapore. looks like AC borrowed the idea of lectures and tutorials form uni, but not the proper way to teach.
the scariest thing, is that this situation is probably not going to change. the makers of this system includes halfwits such as samson tan.
ok i think i shall stop ranting. the reason why we have a holiday today is beacuse of our teachers, so i shall spare them.

honestly, that was probably the only time i ever engaged in critical thinking of anything related to POD. -.-"

well, as for the essay and reflections, ill do them later. eventually, the duedates will get the better of me, i'll come to the conclusion that life and the education system isnt fair, and i'll do the damned work. so why do work when i dont believe in it now? ill do later.

doublethink of teh win!

reading a newspaper article today reminded me of my weight. i checked and found out that i lost weight again. i am 44 kg. =(
i seem to be the only one in the world who is trying to gain weight.. everyone else wants to lose weight.

of course, i dont want to be fat. but i think its actually better than being really skiny, coz at least im not alone in that category of weight problem.

look at how many people want to lose weight. the throngs of people who go for liposuction and surgery, the idiots who pop slim10/tummytrim/slimfit/whatever pills, and the stupid slimming ads that appear at least once every commercial break. urgh.
but do you see people wanting to gain weight? noooo. coz its as simple as "eat more lah"
lucky me. im blessed with metabolism so high, that if i want to maintin my weight of 44kg, i have to eat more than my weight a day. yay me. one elephant thigh for dinner.

ok. thats mroe than enough for today.

tune in next time, for more sardonic post entries!

(haha joking. hopefully, my next few posts should contain less ranting and selfdeprecation, and more mundane narratives. "oh and i had thisandthis for lunch, and then i went with whoandwho to whereandwhere")

(that was a joke too.)

the shooting star that destroyed us all

2005-08-29T17:16:00.000+08:00

come on. you gotta love this song title!
cant say much for the song itself though... talk about loud.

well right now transferring 45 bleach episodes into the laptop. each 20 minutes long.. haha.. thanx toh, for lending ipod. =)

anyways. things have slightly improved, though school is still freakin getting on my nerves. getting back results for term 3 are NOT helping. did bad for some subjects. did ok for others.

restrung my guitar too, albeit slightly wrong. learning songs all over again.. but i still lub my gitty. <3

thursday was crosscountry. had a hilarious time with fish, ianlin, henry, olly, dickson, and waasley after it ended.. ate at novena then went to fish's house. watched hilarious videos of very reatarded people =D
like their sec2 video of NEA and the matrix.. and the video of dicky and ianlin dancing around to stupid songs.. ahhahahaa.
then wepalyed risk! =) so fun. havent played in a longtime. me and dickson were being ganged upon by them.. eh.. just coz we were so strong early game, with australia and portions of asia. then waasley, ianlin, fish and olly formed NATO and destoryed henry and us.. =( tried (unsuccessfully) to rope in ian in an alliance to form IAN-TO... lol.

"gore-meht" - how henry pronounces "gourmet".. lol.

then saturday. went for spookshow. seen once already last year, and most of it was repeated. but still not bad lah. hha.. afetr that, went with tim and olly to suntec to eat. then followed olly to esplanade library.. oooh.

then on the way home, followed a series of unrelated coincidences.
met 2 friends on the way home. was on the bus, and they were at the bus stop. they didnt board the bus, but we saw each other and laughed.
then on the next stop, some guy boarded the bus and sat next to me. he took out the very same book i was reading at the esplanade library. it was an uncommon book by the way, on restringing guitars. weird. i nearly borrowed it too. (i should have, or i wouldnt have restrung it wrong)
and then i met another friend at the bustop i got off.

and that of course set me thinking about many things. (as usual). wanted to blog about it, but i forgot the majority of whatever important stuff i was thinking.
so whatever lah.

and today was ok, surprisingly. i woke up and thought it was going to be bad. but it wasnt that much. still boring, still irritating, but ok. then after school had some exco meeting thing. potentially weird-ish, but turned out alright.
well, it WAS unorthodox. but nevertheless efficient. thanx for helping out =P

so yea. thats it. bleh.

smile like you mean it

2005-08-21T13:57:00.000+08:00

ok well im back.

com AND laptop had a virus. internet connection disabled for the entire month, right after the sentosa thingy.
well, lots of stuff happened this month, but i cant really remember any of it. every thing seems really distant. cant even remember what it was like at NDP celebrations, or what i was feeling when they announced cross-country was postponed. i mean, i do remember most of the narrative details, but nothing of significance to me any more.

these were stuff that happened less than a month ago, yet they've descended into nothing. eventually they'll just fade from memory, so who cares.

sigh. ok, ill be honest. the only reason im blogging today, is because i figured that if i didnt blog soon, then i would feel less like blogging in the future. then if ever wanted to blog again. it'd been too late. makes sense? maybe. maybe not.

anwyays. everything about these few days has been out of sync. i keep having this feeling of being off-beat, the only one who cant seem to fit in somewhere along this mainstream mundanity. like a square peg in a round hole.
school has been unbearable too: its like hell with aircon. people who im usually OK with, ive been feeling a little peeved about. similarly, people who im usually peeved with, ive been pissed about.
and i cant exactly pinpoint what is causing me to be so ticked off. maybe its the work ive been rushing to complete. maybe its the people who are just being really loud playing their soccer or strumming their guitar. maybe its the constant rak-tak-tak-SLAM! of that irritating as hell rubik's cube.
maybe its everything.
i just wanna avoid it altogether. be outside of the class or walk around. or something.

what a pointless entry. "ooh ohh. clem's on a teenage angst rampage."

whatever.

love is only a feeling

2005-08-03T23:28:00.000+08:00

alright... really late. just finished my geog assignemnt. 10 pages long! whoa!
and my printer ran out of ink, so deecky helped me print. thanx deecky! =D

ok.. so these few days been stressful.

2 days ago was more filming for NDP. getting mroe and more lame. urgh
and the choir did the stupid lame NDP dance in the spaceframe. frickin hot in that garb. and was grumpy at some choir people. buggers.

but fooling around with josh in deb8 room was fun. flying around the room retardedly with the acs flag behind me worn like a cape.
and me doing my flexi-tricks.
managed to fit in a cardboard box. what fun.. lol.

then today is mun's birthday. lots of violent and physical stuff happened. >.<
before assembly forgot my tie, borrowed from sandra sim.
had newspaper meeting after school, quite ok. officially known as !nk
then afterwards bought bubble tea and proceeded to spit most of the "bubbles" around.

omg. i am such an idiot >.<

and yea. why the hell am i even blogging.. .sigh.

somewhere only we know

2005-07-31T21:07:00.000+08:00

keane - somewhere only we know

as you can see, new blog design.
done entirely by me! fireworked the pic behind, and coded it by myself. first time working with layers for a blog design instead of tables. looks alright, dont you think? =P

well, life's been alright..

wednesday was spent in school with a very bad headache and a general feeling of cold-mess.

thursday was the same..
then had choir, basically to prepare for the next day's NDP rehersal. at the same time, the madams were going to announce the next year's exco as well..
congrats to the sec3s who made it exco! whoo bliao!
and then they announced the next year's choir council positions.. well, for the uninformed, choir council is bascially a step up from exco for the IB guys. for now, all we do is take on an advisory/mentoring role for the choir people, until next year when there are more girls. then we might work seperately from the main choir as a ensmeble, and do different (and better) stuff.
and then they announced the positions, and im head of council.

i was surprised. and thats all i can say.
i certainly didnt expect it. i honestly thought it would have been collin (but on retrosepct, how could he ever manage to juggle head and OM at the same time next year?)
and at least jerome gave me an ample warning, of say, 5 seconds before siva announced the results. so i wasnt exactly gobsmacked. but i was still surprised.
its going to be very interesting, i think. feels weird to be at the top, but im going to take it as it comes. God put me in this position for a reason, and ill let Him use me and do whatever plan He has for me..

in any case. i guess doing OM next year is definitely out =( lol

then friday morning was the choir performance for the NDP song. it was hilarious. ph34r the HanAn! omg. he seriously cannot dance. i believe as head of council, i can make him move to the back row right? lol..
then school went by as usual. before school ended, had this session with senior admin about future IB plans..
fricking stupid.
wanted to ask questions, but decided not to. coz after a while, you could almost predict what the senior admin were going to say..
and the mainstreamers were asking incredibly stupid questions.
nevermind. shall not say anything else. already ranted for around 20 minutes this morning to my math tuition teacher about IB and the singpaore education system. think ill spare you guys..

then stayed back late with collin, cow, and joel to film for NDP video. wah. darn cool leh. blue screen somemore. and joel's artisitc shots. he's such a perfectionist =P
finished around 8+. urgh.

saturday.. went for church after, a long long abscence of 6 weeks? last week was alpha, the week before my mum's birthday, then FOA performance, then FOA practice, then IOC practice and another IOC practice.
sheesh.
anyway, it was good to be back.

after church went to fort canning for sonicfest! woot! soo fun.
but really tiring too.
what with all the standing and stuff.
and the people behind you singing out of tune.. but who really cares? the speakers drown out everything..

lol.. its late. going to leaveee. byee.

the saddest song

2005-07-26T22:02:00.000+08:00

go go ataris!

ok im back. after a long period of non-existence.

which can mostly be blamed unto stupid mundane things, like homework for one. and the fact that my laptop internet connections screwed up again. AND my phone is a little wonky.

the last reason had nothing to do with blogging. but its sorta covers up my sudden disappearance for the face of the planet

not that it wasnt bad or anything.

it was nice where i was.

well yea. ive be really really busy. the entire last week was full of mad chinese chionging. 12 book reports in 3 days. did 5 the first day, 4 the next day, and then 3 more at a leisurely pace. i must say that i did a really good job.
very pleased with myself =)
and i managed to whip up some crappy presentation on canadian literature. was a bad choice, coz there was absolutely nothing post-colonial about it. but i managed to whack my way thru it, i hope.

and coz of all that work i had to do, i had to skip all the choir sessions the last week, even though we were supposed to perform on chamber night. decided that since i went for none of the practices, there was no point performing.
not that i wanted to perform for chamber anyway.
heard it was not bad, coz they coerced all their exseniors back and hired other people.

felt really bad, coz it was the last week of choir practice for those people who had to be let out for O levels.. prob wont be other sessions to spend time with them..

sigh.

and then school this week. has been very.. uneventful?
health checkups, people setting fire to the lab (and faces), new chem teacher, free periods during chinese, doodling during physics.
and a freakin painful headache the whole of today.

yea. so i guess im back in existence.
but theres nothing to hold me here.

feel like slipping back into my phases of introversion and social diversion..

trouble sleeping

2005-07-17T12:29:00.000+08:00

okok.. after much bugging from colin (swoons!), im going fix my links section. lol.

ilm liking this song loads lately.. dunno why.
im not having trouble sleeping, per se, but having trouble sleeping well.. many stuff been troubling me. hmm.

ok where shall we start. as far back in the week i can remember was misarebis with chamber. it was.. ok lah. the choir wasnt that bad, but we werent fantastic either. but the sec1s and 2s were really intimidated by the conductor.. like really really scared.
the entire rehersal was very un-choirish, coz our usual practices are so boistrous. for once, we actually kept so quiet, you could cut tension like hot butter. which is a good thing, i think. the choir needs some discipline to begin with. anyway, the chamber was pretty flat at certain parts. nyeh.

and then lots of free periods peppered throughout the week. boring stuff. >.< half the timne, i wanted to breakaway from stuff that was happening in class. too noisy and headche-inducing.

erm. then friday was listening comphre. stupid waste of time. i know im not going to do better than last year so why bother.
then went with song to watch fantastic four. met up with marky and BILL PILL there. quite fun, cept it was really rushed. didnt get to talk to pill as much as i wanted to.
great movie too. much better than hulk and daredevil. its prob better than elektra too, but i liked elektra coz of jennifer garner.. lol.. but it can never be up against spiderman or Xmen! gogogo!
then after wards, went for the choir party thing. darn fun. even though i didnt liked some people who went. but it was better to invite them, than for them to crash right? and ivan's house was frickin huge!!

o.0

like xbox and plasma screen TV bigger than... my piano? pool table, CCTVs all over the place, swimming pool.. wahlau! and these touchscreen tablet thingys on the walls that control the lighting and curtain closing and whatnot. >.<
but it was a damn fun time. other than those really overexcited poeple, or people who just made a hell lot of noise. played charades with pictionary cards at one point.. lol... it started out as a means to decide who would claenup the mess downstairs, but it expanded to a real long game with everbody playing.. haha. at least the people who didnt want to play ppol or Xbox had fun with charades..
walked to siglap centre to buy 100 nuggets too.. lol..

well. then yesterday was mum's birthday. went out. erm.. thats it?

nothing impt lah. so yea.

It’s you
Why’s it always you
and never me?
I’ve never dared to let
my feelings free
Why’s it always you
and never me?
I’ve never cared
too much about honesty

sigh. i want to feel so selfish right now.. does that make sense? nvm..

changed my display pic.. dunno. didnt really feel like a kenny anymore.

let me go

2005-07-12T19:47:00.000+08:00

my sis is watching ROTK on the TV just beside me..
wonder how people can speak in such prefect and lyrical english even when they're dying.... "not the taste of strawberries, nor the sound of running water.."

ok that was just such a weird thought.. >.<

anyways.. toh came over to do LA(B) after school... did quite a bit of work.. thought and talked about lots of stuff. dunno why i felt quite miserable.. hmm...

ok. stupid quiz time.

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Clem
2. Clam
3. Clemmy -.-"

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. sighwhyme
2. er... ive always been sighwhyme for everything
3. see above

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. eyes
2. my flexi feet
3. erm.. i dunno. waist? its nice and slim! well.. my entire body is slim.

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. hair
2. arms
3. everything else

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. Chinese
2. Singaporean
3. Do testtubes count?

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Being alone
2. Failure
3. tatoo-ed, drinking, smoking, satanic rockers

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Food
2. Friends
3. Fun!

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. my uniform. gonna shower after this
2. my watch, which i misplaced on sunday, but found again today
3. the AC band wrist band thingy

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS:
1. michelle branch
2. yellowcard
3. ataris/goodcharlotte/threedoorsdown/simpleplan

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS:
1. everywhere (both michelle branch and yellowcard versions)
2. never let you go (third eye blind)
3. iris (goo goo dolls)

THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. no weird moods
2. honesty
3. laughter

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE -PREFERRED- SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. eyes
2. hands
3. smile

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. singing!
2. hangin out with friends
3. erm. eating?

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. shower
2. do chinese filing or im scrooed
3. swim..

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING/YOU'VE CONSIDERED:
1. psychologist
2. teacher!
3. anything random. itll be challenging.

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. back to Sanfran
2. or to NY
3. any place with friends

THREE KIDS NAMES YOU LIKE:
1. Kyle
2. Caleb
3. Ewan. (as in ewan-mcgregor "ewan". not elaine-wan "Ewan")

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. to perform something crazy on stage! rock on!
2. to say something meaningful to everyone who's special in my life
3. err. do somehitng ive never doen before. like parasailing or something >.<

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
1. erm. i talk quite a lot?
2. er... i sing? you dun know HOW many people think choir is a sissy thing..
3. i like lit? humanities are more girl-ish than guy-ish? i dunno...

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
1. i look like a guy. duh.
2. i listen to very guyish music?
3. ive got my pride too! meh.

collide

2005-07-11T20:18:00.000+08:00

choir nite is finally over >.<

lets just say it was an ok attempt. but you could tell everything was really last minute.. choreo and song fixing and the stage set...

first half of the show was really really bad, but at least the second half was alright..
i was emcee together with collin, and it was alright as well. i thought i did an OK job, considering that i had to make up on the spot the entire last section of emceeing (collin didnt have his cue cards for the second half).
and i think the way we handled the unexpected problems was good too. like for exmaple the MR screwups.. there were ALOT of technical glitches (dunno what happened to MR) videos didnt play, curtains closing too soon, no spotlight, stage lights not dimmed, emcee mikes flickering on and off, forgetting to give soloists EQ-ed mikes... yea..
and when our giant globe got wrecked by pohyee the day before performance... $80 worth of 3D wire mesh and felt cloth... wrecked by that bumbing idiot.. so we had to do a comepletely new one on the day of performance itself.. which was amazing, coz we did it in double quick time and with the outcome lookin pretty good too..

i think all in all, upon 10, i would give it a... 6? 6.5?

but for the people behind everything, i give 10/10.. amazing job, guys..

thank you kenneth.. for being a darn cool prez.. one of the nicest people i know, and a very special choir president.. =) i still remember the day before the preformance, where me and jerome saw you sweeping the floors of the audi to get ready for a run-thru.. jerome saw you and said "humble president".. i'll remember that scene always =)

thanx peter.. for conjuring up the entire set so magically.. you're really a darn excellent painter.. and even though you spent so many late nights on the globe, to have it being wrecked the day before performance, you were the only person who didnt want to kick pohyee's ass.. you had every right to be angry, but you didnt..

thanx collin, fellow emcee =) we pulled it off, eh? even though you were sick and tired, you still came.. it was fun being cohosts with you... =D

thanx ivan, for staying up so late doing the videos.. i was supposed to do them, but i took too long to learn how to use the program, i jsut had to give it up.. lol.. thanx also for conducting whenever ewan wasnt around.. you spent so much time working on the second half, til the choir had the amount of energy.. =)

thanx chris, bong, jerome, kaiheng, lanerd and the rest of the riser people.. you did a really fast switch.. =) jerome the stage manager doing a fine job.. and bong just being bong all the time, giving me some sense of normality even though backstage was a pressure cooker and everythign felt so surreal.. lol.. chris too, haha.. dunno how you manage with all the stress..

and of course daniel and jeremy.. fine job! not easy being a pianist, ok..
and everybody else.. we tried and did our best.. it was fun lah!

and of course to the people who came.. sorry it wasnt what i wanted to deliver.. sorry the performance was terrible at parts.. you have no idea how grateful i am you guys came..
its not about ticket sales or filling up the audi that mattered to me..
it was that fact that you guys came and watched, and it made it all the more worthwhile to perform..
=)

mmm.
too tired to blog about anythign else..... WANCAKES!!!

keepin the faith

2005-07-09T23:19:00.000+08:00

when the rock n roll plays..
the memory stays..
and im just keepin the faith...

oh well. one day to FOA.

not feeling too confident. coz we're really unprepared. it might be a flop for all i knwo it... sigh.

i just don't want to let down anyone who's coming down to watch. they paid money to support, and i wanna give something back.. like good music and a fun time.. >.<

whatever happens, its jsut another performance, and im going to have a fun time..

a stressful, nervewrecking, maybe disastrous, maybe miraculous performance. but im gonna have a fun time.

ticket sales dont matter. filling up the seats dont matter. performing for all my friends who bought tickets to support DOES matter. thanks everyone =)

ill pray, and ill remember to keep the faith.

...the good ol days werent always good... tomorrow aint as bad as it seems...

absolutely

2005-07-07T22:11:00.000+08:00

ok.. havent blogged for a week now.

well, been busy the entire of last week at the IOC thingy. freakin stupid.

finally got the IOC thing over and done with. saturday, sunday, monday and tuesday was intensive rehearsal all the way through at the esplanade. esplanade backstage is darn freakin cool! huge complex and maze of stuff of corridors and dressing rooms and stuff.

lots of cool stuff happened, but cant really remember..

quite disappointing too, coz while performing, the only person i could recognise was hsien loong. boo.

and the entire week was FOA all the way. freakin stressful. i have a freakin million things to worry about.. >.<

gah. dun feel like writing anything else. too much i wanna say, too little time. typing's too slow...

come choir on sunday! tix at $6 and $10. =)

she-spider

2005-06-30T21:05:00.000+08:00

shared this song with toh last year, and subsequently started a craze in the taiwan trip. lol..

what a goth sounding track. dark and haunting stuff, without degenerating into a heavy metal scream-fest.

well. was in my room staring at the ceiling and thinking about stuff... thoughts all over the place... sigh.
there are so many things i want to say, but i dont. how do i say it =S
erm... like how sometimes you want to say something thats on your mind. that raw unrefined voice in your head, that tumbles from thought to tongue. but you catch it at the very last moment because of some reason or another.

perhaps you want to say how much you appreciate a friendship. but words from the heart just dont suit platonic relationships, and the absense of acknowledgement from the other party crushes you.

or perhaps you want to say how much you love someone. but you dont in the end, because of the premise of a misunderstanding. or maybe because admitting it leaves us to vulnerability that we are not accustomed to.

or maybe you want to tell in brutal honesty your opinions of another's actions. but silence is easier to endure than cacophonies of guilt, and ignorance can always be bliss.

or perhaps you want to express words of sympathy or encouragement. but true feelings are harder to say when not disguised as pithy one-liners.

all these social inhibitions and facades that cloud our feelings...
so which is worse: saying something and regretting it? or not saying anything and regretting it as well?

sigh. just though i should write all of this down in the blog. what better way to capture the silenced voices, than to be immortalised and shouted all around the world?

oh well then. so much for a minirant.
anyways, tomorrow we're supposed to hand in our subject options. and i guess it took up to right now for people to realise that we may never be in the same class again in the subsequent years.
i dunno how i might survive. its gonna be shit without my closest friends.

for one thing, im not a person with a huge network of friends. i just have a moderate amount of friends around, and then a few that i keep very close to my heart. without the latter... sigh.

well.. here's my subject combis:
HL Language Arts
HL Chem
HL Maths
SL Chinese
SL Econs
SL Physics

really gotta work hard for Maths and Physics. they have been my shortcomings all along. but i have to make it, and i know i wil..

sigh. life goes on.

don't dream it's over

2005-06-28T23:13:00.000+08:00

well. i had no song in mind for the title, so i set itunes on shuffle and clicked the button a few times.
and tada!

kinda appropriate, coz holidays have ended.

and there's no more OM! which i really really miss. the first feelin that hit me as i walked into the school gates on monday was akin to waking up from dream. i dunno why.
a surreal yet wonderful dream that lasted for so long it felt almost tangible. but then like all dreams after you wake up, you kinda forget about them.
but i dun think i can ever forget the great time i had in OM. ever.

well, despite OM being out of my life for the time being, shadows of it seem to creep out to me in every single way.
like on saturday, the freakin IOC people changed calltimes(again) from 2 to 5. which meant 3 hours of timewasting. so to kill time, me and collin settled in KFC with his laptop, watching videos of OM.
my first reaction when collin was showing the video was "oh shit! we're gonna watch this embarrasing part. or this part we act totally shameless. or this damn lame part that i cringe whenever we perform"
but surprisingly, i didnt feel uncomfortable watching our performance at all. it was actually quite funny. and i was darn proud. =)

and then on monday was prize presentation for OM. our results didnt look very impressive on screen, what with the 19th position and all that. but i am damn happy! and i wasnt as bothered as i thought i would have, showing the bimbo-acting part on stage. i guess i was a bit too concerned about "face" and all that in front of the entire school. but whatever lah, it was darn funny.

fastforward lame stuff on first day of school. like PCvideo... "learn to learn to learn!" *blood shoots out ear*
and then today after IHS, me, poh and josh snuck into the compserv room to look for the sanfran coffee mug we bought for madam. saw the dragon head. the raincoats. the coat with miklaus' autograph. sigh.

i just cant stop thinking about OM! but i guess its normal: OM withdrawal symptoms. kinda like the taiwan ppl when they just came back. rest assured from now on, anything about OM will be restricted to passing comments and never again to a blog entry. =P

ok.
i couldnt resist it. i just have to do it one more time.

I <3 OM! whoo!

there. i did it.

anyways, this term is damn impt to me. my prev 2terms was 65%, 66% respectively. which (to me) is bad. AND i failed physics too.

im trying to buck up now. abit too late perhaps? but better late than never. i moved my seat riiiight in front now so i can pay more attention.
it works, to be honest. for example, i managed to pay attention for physics, and actually understood logic gates. (but progressively into the lesson, jason chan just became crappy at teaching).
and i listened to winhon lesson today! *beams* big improvement.

well. choir today was.. BIG. shall blog abt it another day. =)

every night's another story

2005-06-25T23:19:00.001+08:00

err i think by now you should know that the title is also a song. and they're nice songs too. so i dun need to say "nice nice!" anymore, just go listen to it urself =P

ok lets see. yea.

on wednesday went birding with olly and henry. met at KAP at round 7.30, then walked 20 minutes to bukitbatok nature reserve. we walked 5 minutes into it, then decided it was a horrible place to watch birds.. packed up and then left. -.-"
then crashed at my house. darn funny. while walking here, henry was making his usual dumb comments.

"eh eh. you know ian lin's, fish's and jong's father's names are the same! raymond, raymond, raymond. like twins liddat!"

lol.. cannot count.
and henry cannot pronouce "hashbrowns". its supposed to be hash-rhymes-with-dash. but henry pronounces it HARSH. rhymes with MARSH. lol. HARSHBROWNS.
then at my house did really lame stuff. like completed the entire metal slug 3 game with 102 credits used. and watch a bit of bleach. and then went on olly's msn to scare a few ppl.. lol. but i think we went a bit too far.. =S

then next day class bbq. ooh fun fun. foozball and starting fires and kebabs and warty sausages and kiahuas and cats with retractable -errr... nvm
wanted to stay really late and go sentosa or soemthing. but that would have meant taking a cab.. after midnight x1.5! no way!

then friday was stupid. was halfway on the way to choir when LANERD called and said it was cancelled. WTF.
then went home to muck around. then went for choir AGAIN. this time it was for some "choral olympics" thingy. apparently some combined schls choir needed some tenors and basses, and asked ACS to supply some. we dismissed the name, "choir olympics", as some lame figurative phrase to its prestige or soemthing.
but only when we went there did they tell us we were performing for the IOC.
"huh? IOC? wazzat?"
then they told us it stood for international olympic committee.
"WOOT!" =DD

yea. so we're perforimng for the opening night of the IOC meeting in singapore, where they announce whos hosting 2012.
cool right?

well maybe not. despite all the "performing in front of people around the world" and it being "represeting singapore" and all - it really didnt cut it.

firstly, they didnt even get good choirs to sing. like ACS is the only choral excellence school. the other schools invited to sing were like, gan eng seng and monk's hill. (BTW, the monk's hill sec school people actually call themselves monkshillians. OMG! snort, chuckle..)
they are choirs who have never seen the light of gold in syf. and the only reason AC was invited to sing was because the woman who arranged the piece helped us once for SYF. and they desperately needed tenors and basses on short notice.
there were no other choirs with calibre, like RI or VS or Cathigh. we were actually the best choir there. !!!
i have no idea why they choose such crappy schools to perform when it is representing singapore. like, really important and all. i think the governement never calls indep schls down.. ever wondered why no independent or autnomous school has ever performed for NDP parade? exactly.

and sceondly, these freakin ppl keep changing call times. they told us 2, and then when me and collin reach there on time, they call and change to 5. and then again to 4.30. freakin hell! we're the only school without a teacher to supervise, coz we dun really need one, but.. honestly! pushing us arnd coz we're students.
bah.

=(

well yea. i cant rememebr what else i wrote here coz blogger ate half my post. so i reconstructed the previous few paragraphs from memory. but im sure i missed out something. whatever... -.-"

don't panic

2005-06-21T12:36:00.000+08:00

don't panic - coldplay

not H2G2 related in any way. i read the book. it stinks.

anyways. i ponned choir today.
i didnt mean to, really. i was really planning on going for choir this morning. but i woke up late, and realised i could only reach choir at 12+. and choir usually ended around 3.
whats to do in 3 hours?

and anyway, it wouldve been like yesterday. a waste of time.
ewan is busy with NDP stuff, ranjee has diahorrea, mr tan cant start his car, so none of them came.
and without any of the teachers, next to nothing gets done. i led a bit of warmups and made it a bit mroe challenging, coz its usually a huge joke. sectionals were dead boring as usual.
the only interesting thing that happened was that me and jerome stole poh yee's shoe and caused him to go all SPAZ for half an hour.

so yea. i am not going back to choir until ewan comes back. we honestly get NOTHING done.

but then im at home and im getting nothing done as well.

juz read my old blog entries from sec2.
wow. i mean. wow.
firstly, i was such a prat in sec2. i honestly had too much time.
secondly, i miss all the stuff that used to happen in sec2. i was so carefree and happy all the time. i remember all the digs we made at teachers, like all the Ma Chung Wai jokes, the Faggot Oh jokes, Lenu Yeo's PMS and Tan Soon Cheng the shrivelled bamboo.
i remember the lanning with waasley and yappie, the sec2 OM which was a failure, getting sunburnt at NCC kayaking, even teachers day celebrations and chocolate sluts.

i miss sec2.

the "me" in sec2 and the "me" now is so different. sometimes, i wish i could remain the way i did in sec2.
but i also know that i cant. and that i shouldnt.

coz its called growing up.

the quiet things that noone knows

2005-06-20T17:29:00.000+08:00

the quiet things that noone knows - brand new

kk. not much to blog about. except saturday was my sis' bdae and we ate dinner together as a family. jap food, jap food!
and i bought a book, The Rule of Four, which was surprisingly good. dan-brownesque plot (about the hypnerotomachia poliphili), but way better than da vinci or any of that crap.

then today we had choir again. one of the reasons i came, was becuase collin promised me to show the OM video he made for the school. and i wanted to see if any embarassing stuff made its way in it.. lol. i dun want the school to see any part of our performance! especially me! too embarassing!
(lol. which is techinically impossible. coz i happen to appear in every single scene and in freakin ugly costumes doing stupid stuff that shouldnt be shown in public)
BUT collin never came today! he was sick. bugger!

anyway. in true spririt of my blog title (the quiet things that noone knows), i feel like putting little stuff about me that few people really know. lol.

1) i hate seafood. i think my dislike for it manifested when i was around 5 and i choked on a fishbone. as for the rest of the seafood, i just dont like the general taste of squirmy swimming stuff. (but i eat raw fish. im weird. im weiiird.)

2) i am pathetically bad at any game i play. i cant do sports. i am notoriously bad at any com game. i can miss the white ball in pool. i cheat at monopoly. i cant even play tic tac toe with my sister right.. -.-'

3) for someone who is supposed to be a bit literary, i have never read any great works like charles dickens or whatever. i have never read LOTR, though i tried. and i havent even read R and J fully yet!!!

4) i am neither left brained nor right brained. i dunno. i keep doing all these quizzes and stuff but they all give me different answers!

5) in pri 1, i whacked a guy and got sent to the principals office. -.-' please! how hard can a pri 1 kid whack?! he wasnt even hurt, dammit. but i pissed off the discipline mistress because the kid i whacked was the teacher's pet.

6) colin pointed out to me in US that i occasionally lapse into an accent whenever i speak to an american. soonkai and kevin does it too =P

7) im a testtube baby.

8) when i think too much, i fall alseep.

9) i can bake cookies. =)

10) i don't really hate NCC.

11) i have never watched a horror movie in my entire life.

12) i still play pokemon when im bored... =X

13) i love cartoons and comics.. whooo xmen!

14) sometimes i can talk lots of crap and be very hard to shut up. but sometimes i need my space and i just stop talking to anybody for a few days.

15) i dont show it, but i care about lots of people in my life.

boo. so there.

if i told you this was killing me, would you stop?

2005-06-17T16:44:00.000+08:00

if i told you this was killing me, would you stop? - The Juliana Theory

what a rockin song: "why can't you make up your mind?"... what a long title too. =P

ok.. happenings these past few days..
toh came over on tuesday. he lent me his ipod to transfer all 20+ epsodes of bleach into my laptop.. thanx! =D quite a cool anime. then we went out to eat dinner and play pool. ran into josh's brother. then after he left, i stuck around at HMV and listened to lots of tracks.. grr. so many CDs i wanna buy.
got home really late and pissed my parents off very badly.. aparently ive been going out too much, and that i should stay at home and try to get into the studying mood.. well, i have had lots of fun at US..
and then they confiscated the laptop, hid it somewhere, AND grounded me. poo. cant even watch the remaining 20 episodes of bleach.

then spent the entire wednesday mucking around the house(coz there was no choir).. swam a bit in the morning. then cleared up my entire room, which was cluttered with stuff from US, like OM memorabilia, souvenirs and US coins.. lol.

then thursday had choir. on the car ride to school, my parents were going on and on, lecturing me on not going out anymore for the rest of the holidays. but that choir session was supposed to be some slack games-and-movie day, and i was like "uh oh... better not tell them.."
games was kinda stupid..my group won, due to my very cheap tactics..
our cheer went something like this:

me: "if got loophole then?"
sec1/2: "EXPLOIT!"
me: "if can cheat, then?"
sec1/2: "CHEAT!"
me: "good job, guys!"

then at the end of the games we went around taupoking ppl, dunking them with cold water and sprite ice.. lol..

then me and bong took a bus to cine, while the rest took a cab.. watched batman begins, which was way better than i expected. no "duh" or cheesy moments, and fun to watch.. the only i didnt like was that the batmobile didnt have any bat-like sleekness.. looked more like a giant black hamburger driving in the streets.. and scarecrow was too fugly.. no cool costume.

and today. was pretty dumb. was raining so couldnt swim. wanted to watch mr and mrs smith but couldnt. meh. walked all the way to KAP to rent a movie, but i didnt know that i had to be over 16 to rent. my bdae's in dec, so they didnt allow. bummer.

sigh. dunno whats wrong with me. im not feeling happy or whatever, when i should be. in the meanwhile, i just need to be alone to sort out stuff. ugh.

and i need to get into the work doing mood soon.. i should be catching up on my work more than anybody else, what with OM and SYF and all that nonsense.

sigh. love these lines from "eve, apple of my eye" (prev post title)

Now this applies both equally to you and I
The only thing we share
Is the same sky
These empty metaphors
They're all in vain
Like can't you see the grass is greener where it rains

And I lie behind you
And a cradle you in the palm of me
And I pat your hair down
I think will we sink or swim?
'Cause we could do either on a whim

Eve says let's give it a try
Eve is the apple of my eye

eve the apple of my eye

2005-06-13T13:59:00.000+08:00

ugh.

friday night went to watch PCK the musical with the choir people. it was shit. dont watch. saturday had OM celebration thingy. sunday, went malaysia. was crap, hated it.

im feeling so monosyllabic today. im just so disgusted about the entire matter. im feeling so pissed but i dont know WHO im pissed at. i just want to pour everything out here, but i know ill make the matter worse for everyone.

maybe i should remove myself from this entire situation altogether.. one obviously thinks it better without me around because he thinks everthing's fine and dandy, while the other thinks i dont care.

i don't know how.
how to prevent losing both these friends. it seems almost impossible not to lose one over the other.. im prepared for the worst case scenario, which is that ill lose both..

whatever. i give up.

You left I died
I went You cried
You came I think

But I never really know
I've served my time
I've watched you climb
The wrong incline
But what do I know

such great heights

2005-06-08T21:13:00.000+08:00

the postal service - such great heights

oooh. what a rockin song..

anyway.. i wanted to blog last night, but was busy uploading OM pics up to the internet.. and here it is!
enjoy! 90+ pics.. heehee.

ok.. so i found out the reason i was so tired the last week.. it was partially the jetlag, but was really the contacts i was wearing.. it made my eyes super dry and i was blinking a mile a minute.. i felt like sleeping whenever i wore it out..

like how i was playing pool with toh.. oh gosh. my cue can miss the white ball completely.. and i had to ask him twice midgame whether i was solids or stripes.. i think i wasted toh's time.. they were really horrible games. sorry.. lol.

BUT. i got my new specs liao. had to pay out of my pocket though, coz the pair i lost was only 2 months old.. bleh.

and then there was the wedding.. whoo.. JT and KT.. what a couple =P
it was a cool wedding.. the day before we went to the church to decorate the place.. we were supposed to deisign signs, like directions to the carpark and buffet area and all that..
we were drawing the signs for about an hour and then suddenly realised that the table we were working on was the altar table.. but we din care and continued working..lol.. dman lame.
and then me and olly went popular to get coloured cards and ribbon to make a booklet-thing for the whole network to write their bleesings on them.

the next day, me and yaoqun were up at the balcony to work the PA, like the video and powerpoint. wargh. no screwups, except for worship, where i pressed the wrong button and sent the ppt back to the first slide instead of the next slide.. lol.. so paiseh.. but other than that, nothing wrong..
and then there was the exchanging of vows and all that.. so sweet!
so they were officially JT and KT.. lol.
oh yea.. auggy and collin came too! thx guys..

and something damn stupid happened after the ceremony at the buffet.. me and olly and auggy were having a conversation, when i suddenly realised we were blocking the drinks area, and that people were behind us queueing up for punch. so i said "eh guys, i think we should move somewhere else.. we're blocking the punchline".. we stared at each blankly before realising the ultra-lame joke.. whalau. it wasnt even intentional.. uurrrrrrr...
we went for church which was fun.. and then rushed immediately for the wedding dinner at trader's hotel. by that time, i needed to change my contacts (dailies), so i popped the old ones out and tried to fit in new ones.. so before the dinner i was at the toilet frantically stuffing it into my eyes while timlim waited.. the one on my left eye wouldnt stay and dropped off.. had to get a new one.. bah.
and then the dinner was quite funny. sat next to olly and timlim.. reminded me of orientation dinner.. marcus accidentally dropped a carrot carving of an old man into the bowl of floating candles.. a magnificent plunk and it was submerged.. damn funny.. and martin stuck a fish head on the glass.. gross..... -.-"
got to talk to shiao too.. funny.. =)

then congratulated JT and KT.. whee.

going for choir everday of the week now. preparing for FOA which is going to be fun stuff! that also reminds me..

CHOIR NIGHT TIX GOING FOR $6!! got $10 seats too.. so be nice, people and come watch!

lol.. today was a very thought provoking day..
before choir, i seeked a friend for counsel.. through the conversation, i was reminded of many things that were out of my control.. things that made me feel so helpless...
also spent some time with another friend.. he mentioned how i changed quite a bit, partially coz we drifted apart slightly for a period of time. thought about the future and whether friendships would still remain after ACS. probably not, and thats a terrible thing.. sigh..

oh well.. its alright to go retrospective, but delving into cynicism and self-indulgence is a scary thing..

ill leave it as that.. in case you didnt see the top part... the om pics are HERE!! =DD

a.o.k

2005-06-01T12:09:00.000+08:00

motion city sountrack- A.O.K

ok.. im alive, awake and alert...
jet lag really got the better of me these 2 days. there was the O levels which was very bad.. i think i actually did worse than last year, even though i didnt study last year... come to think of it, i didnt even remember what question they asked for any of the papers, much less what i answered.
i stopped half an hour before the paper 1 ended, coz i wanted to sleep so badly...

and yesterday, i woke at 5am naturally.. around 6pm i was nearly zonked.. but i met with olly and jason to go to JT's new house.. whoa.. looks pretty good.. mucked around and went home around 11..

been missing america.. now that im not semi-conscious, ive actually been able to remember lots of things that happened there.. the great people, the weather, the company, the stuff we did...
regret not meeting more people, regret not taking more pictures, regret buying more stuff........
shucks man.. i only bought stuff for family >.< and of course myself... i promised lots of people presents, but i didnt buy.. shucks.. dunno how my $$ disappeared so quickly.. ARGHHH

shit.. i need to go out more... movie anyone? food? lan? pool? anything??

america2

2005-05-30T22:23:00.000+08:00

wheeee. im back.

and i guess you've heard, somehow or rather, that we're 19th position for worlds! whoo! not bad, ok.
if you recall back to nationals, we screwed up our long term, but did well for spontaenous. this time, our long term was very good, with a raw score among the top 5 teams. we even beat the champion school!
but we screwed up spontaenous this time -.-" coz we got a handson problem instead of a verbal problem, which we would have owned at. we were the only team in AC suay enough to get handson, and noone in our team was very technical..
nvm lah.. i think we did very well. love my team members.. =)

anyway.. the previous post was typed out in a big hurry... don't think if anyone understood..
after that post, there were still lots to the trip.. actually, most of it cant be explained by words, but rather by pictures... ill have to upload my pics sometime this week and post it up... my pic are velly good one!!

hmmm... after that, we met up with our buddy team (who are really cool people from san diego, california). watch them perform longterm, which was quite good. then we had lunch at UMC, where lenie cho treated me and daniel at subway (she's damn farnee lah, wahlau). and then we slacked around and went shopping.
erm.. then we had closing ceremony which was damn fun.. was one of few lucky people who managed to get a "OM 2006 - SEE YOU AT IOWA!" shirt.. they were throwing it randomly at a national-stadium sized hall.
and then the results, which were ok.. quite disappointed coz the prob5div2 team didnt get 1st, which we all wanted them to get... then after all the rah-rah and photos, we went around trading stuff. i traded singapore tinsel sticks for arizona frog, and then for pennsylvania wizardhat.. =P (basically, each state/country has a unique item they carry/wear for opening and closing ceremony - newyork and pennsylvania were most popular =P)
i got a kansas scarecrow too..

and then, there was a teen's party, which was quite retarded. lots of flashing lights and bad bad music. i think the only thing cool there was a swimming pool of pepsi cans.. lol.
so we went outside and met someother teams.. met some really cool georgia team. ncie people..
then packed and slept..

woke up, and ate at denny's.. funky place man. too bad they dun have it in s'pore. then we took bus and plane to sanf fran!!!

WHEE!!

stayed at pickwick hotel, which is damn nice place.
ate at burgerkings for dinner. -.-'
sanfran is a damn nice place...

first day, we went sightseeing places. first some werid pond and columns thingy place. then to golden gate bridge.. then to gilroys...
factory outlet with 100+ stores!! AH!!

went crazy and bought lots of stuff.. 4 shirts, 2 boardshorts, a cap, and presents for family.. stupid kevin had traveller's checks... 2000 bucks worth of it too... bugger. at night, we ordered movies to watch. we watched meet the fockers, and constantine.. i fell asleep in the middle of constantine though.. =P

and then next day we went to fisherman's pier.. ian cheong had his favourite clam chowder.. we took a ferry to alcatraz.. dman cool place.. then went back for lunch at pier39.. the manager of the restaurant that we ate in was a singaporean himself. he knew ACS and gave us free donuts.. we got harassed by Amercian-Chinese punks.. and we watched a busker and bought her CD.. lol

the had icecream at ben and jerry's (THEY HAVE SCOOP SHOPS THERE! OMG). my first butter pecan fell on the ground (crap) but i bought a second cookiedough with collin.
then ian cheong dragged us to girardeli square, which was dman boring. we feel asleep at the benches to the sound of spanish guitars.. then awoke to walk 20 blocks back to our hotel.. met some philadelphia couple on the way.. trekked the hilly roads of sanfran together with then.. dman tiring..
then went back hotel rest abit. then followed kevin josh and poh to buy their guildwars.. then at night, a huge group of us went to a nearby mall to watch revenge of the sith!! damn expensive. regular ticket S$14.. and it wasquite disappointing too..

then the nxt few days the flight back.. was likeshit.. damn tiring, and i lost my glasseson the last flight back.. shit.. so tired now. dman you jetlag.

wahlua.. this post is damn incoherent lah. anybody who understood eveyrthing compeltely, goodjob to you.. next time, ill post pictures, and then i can explian eerything better... or i can jsut explain face2face.. duh..

going tosleep now.. Zzz

america

2005-05-24T23:17:00.000+08:00

oh yay... it's 9 in the morning here in denver.. going to hacve breakfast if i have time. sorry for some typos... keyboard sux..

anyway. finished competition yesterday afternoon. had spontaenous problem on monday, and had longterm yesterday. we're the only ACS(I) team to have finished, coz the rest have spontaenous today. we're have the entire of today free!

we're gonna watch ACS(J) perform soon and then support our buddy team from San Diego california. they're a pretty cool bunch..

ok... lets see what i can blog about so i dun have to go thru th entire works when i get back..

packed all our stuff and flatpacked our props at around 2 in the morning, then arrived airport at 5.. got to meet other AC teams better. watched the incredibles, ocean's 12, lemony snickets as inflight movie...
24++ hours long in travel time!! Singapore to Tokyo, to Sanfran, to Denver.. transited at narita airport, japan looks damn fun. but everything is freakin expensive. i think it was 80+ sing dollars on food alone. stupid yen is inflated to ultra gayness... instant noodles for $5????

whee. nearly lost my baggage when it didnt show up in denver... scary. then took a bus to university of colorado... wah... damn cool man.. super huge campus, and nice weather...

errr. cant think of anything much to say.. prob gtta go soon...

cant ay anything abt spont pob or long term prob until after competition...
cept spont was "darn stupid" (-josh) and was "retarded lah, wahlau" (-kevin). but we all said that long term was "VELLY GOOD!!!!"

americans here in OM are super friendly. really! =) americans arent as obnoxious as eveyrone thinks. er... pins here are dman cool... err. colin is DMAN COOL!!! WHOO! and erm. we iceskated last night... funky!
errr.. DQ her is cooolnees.ss.. byebyebyebyebey

friday, i'm in love

2005-05-20T01:38:00.000+08:00

whooooooa. i cant believe it.

It's Friday
It's D-Day

It's Leaving-For-US Day

im leaving singapore in a little more than 4 hours. =DDDDDDDD....

sorry i havent blogged for an entire week... coz after the stupid exams, OM was doubly intensive. from like 6 in the morning to 11 at night.. many times leaving at midnight.. and after countless script changes, alterations to props, new acting, mood swings and many many good memories, we're at the finish line.

I don't care if monday's blue
Tuesday's grey and wednesday too
Thursday I don't care about you
It's friday I'm in love

nostalgia, man. from the beginning of our OM, to the pre-nationals period, to nationals itself, to exam period, to after exams... we're finally going US and we're finally going to kick ass.

Monday you can fall apart
Tuesday wednesday break my heart
Thursday doesn't even start
It's friday I'm in love

we'd better. i didnt flunk subjects, become an insomniac, stay late at night in school, AND miss revenge of the sith for nothing.

I don't care if monday's black
Tuesday wednesday heart attack
Thursday never looking back
It's friday I'm in love

the U S of A... my heart palpitates just saying it... lol... this is damn exciting...

i'll take lots of pictures, and try to blog there. wheeeeeee...

everything you want

2005-05-08T15:17:00.000+08:00

vertical horizon - everything you want

bleh. lang arts paper was quite crappy. never expected them to throw a robert frost. at least i was calm, collected and understood the poem.
wanted to write lots of things, but there was only one hour to the paper, so there wasnt enough time..
spent lots of time analysing the poem as a whole, like speaker and rhythm and symbols etc.. instead of the very important theme of irony, which i left to the very last 5 minutes..
on a note of consolation, i did harp a bit in the middle of the paper about the obvious contrast and conflict between the 2 people. AND i made some cheem-sounding points.

i think ill do OK, but not as well as i want to do. now to see how i fared. >.<

then stayed back for winhon remedial where we learnt some pretty good stuff.. then after remedial, me toh poh and niche stayed back outside staff room to ask mroe questions. talked to winhon.. dont blame him for thinking that i was "disinterested in maths" during lesson.. hope he understands why now.. then me and poh stayed back all the way til 8+ in school. we went dover market to eat diner, then went back to school...
after dinner, we din really feel like doing math anymore, so we talked instead. i really enjoyed it.. poh is really insightful, and one of the few people i can have a long serious conversation with.. hmm.

couldnt go church on saturday.. boo. at least i did some solid revision.

had tuition in the morning, for maths. my last year's work is pretty OK. only prob is vectors.. grr. irritating.

made a cake with my sis for mother's day just now.. oh my gosh. damn funny. will explain it some other day... its too stupid to put on the blog.
anyway. it turned out very well, i must add.

now time to study chinese.
joy.

beautiful mistake

2005-05-04T16:23:00.000+08:00

i feel like im finally getting back on track.

yesterday was an extremely productive day. not only did i finish Physics Alternative Assignemnt with marky during La(A) period, i also did 4 (FOUR!) yue du bao gaos after school in the library. and i started on my La(B) individual assignment.

hopefully, today ill be able to finish my LA(B) assignment and POD essay. and then i'll have no overdue work, and i can study properly.

i can do it! wish me luck =P

anyways. on a depressing note. ive been selected to present my stupid ISO project again.. noooo... horrible memories of the last presentation are sitll fresh in my mind. and it's some competition thingy too with judges. and the mainstream are gonna own us for sure...
i mean, they actually want to do ISO. we've done it since pri4, so we're just jaded. i really dun give a shit what kind of shows they show on TV, and whether the level of violence is suitable!!

on top of that, me royt and mun have to present AEM. urk.

AND lawmiewfong's been a bitch.. why? all will be revealed tomorrow. whatever man.

hey jude

2005-05-02T22:07:00.000+08:00

my sister's been playing this song all day ever since she heard it on TV for one of the AMI commercials. its a nice song, but after it's been stuck in your head for hours, you'll hate it. trust me.

anyway. couldnt blog for quite a long time, coz of many reasons. one, of course being the ubiquitous common tests. (noo. not exams. common tests). that stupid thing has been niggling in the back of my head (alongside "hey jude", mind you) the entire week. it's been a bitch.
the other reason is that my internet on my laptop suddenly stopped working again. irritating. but then again, it's a blessing in disguise, coz i can focus on work more.
third reason, is that i didnt feel like blogging. the dread and responsibilities of everything cling on to me everyday when i go home. it's suffocating, you know? see if you wanna blog if you were me.

there's OM, which has been a total whack off. thursday and friday were absolutely horrible days for me. the OM sessions were just crap. i didnt know what went wrong. i think we were too tired and kept making many mistakes. but i disagree that we should cut some slack and take a break. for goodness sakes, we might have to perform on monday chapel immediately after common tests (oh please no). if we don't so something NOW, like when? the day before common tests? or (im not sure if this is better or worse) the day after common tests?
i dunno lah. but i think backing out from OM now for common tests is quite selfish. everybody's tired and everyone wants to start on his work too.. sigh
i guess bill pill was right lah. this team is a damn hodgepodge. theres a million things i can think of, that can go wrong with our group dynamics. it never managed to surfaced during the road to nationals. but it's starting to rear it's ugly head now...
and another thing bill pill is right about. i really gotta take a stand as the leader sometimes, and be more assertive. which is partially true, coz i usually don't. i mean, why do i find it so hard to ask people to shut the fuck up? (well, its not that hard for people i don't like. but for everyone else...)
sigh. it just seems so easy for other people, but not for me. maybe it's because i don't want to appear demanding or trod on some toes or whatever.

anyway. spent the entire day today in school for OM (!!!). we were the only freaks who would go to school on labour day. an entire morning and afternoon devoted to snipping and sewing and painting and other interesting stuff.
then the rest of the day revising maths, and im dead tired. yes that is what hours of intensive math can do to you. i was cramming all 4 months of work, making up for lost time with lots of practice and concept understanding. but i only have the feeling of desperately grabbing as much sand as possible, only to have it slip through your fingers into nothing. yea thats what my brain feels like. a sieve.

suffice to say, it is my fault the reason why i'm failing maths. i mean, the last piece of homework i handed up to winhon was the Loci assignment. that includes all assignments and classwork subsequently after (which is alot). and despite how many times i write "differentiation sucks" on my practice papers, it is still my fault. not win hon, not OM, not choir.

don't get me wrong, im not angry or anything. nor am i disapointed or depressed or angsty, contrary to the above written. (which is a bit hard to believe, even for myself while i reread this entry.. lol..) really, im not. maybe im just tired.

i like hey jude, because the last part of the song means absolutely nothing. just 4 whole minutes of "na na na na na na na, na na na na, hey jude". and i feel just like that.

just like that.
peachy.

differentiation still sucks

wake me up when september ends

2005-04-26T20:55:00.000+08:00

this song owns. =)

havent blogged for ages, coz my internet jus stopped working.. IE and Firfox wouldnt work coz there was "no connection" or summin.. but the strangest thing was that my Msn worked perfectly fine... unusual...

eventually, my uncle fixed the internet connection. and his theory was that i was borrowing wireless signal from my neighbour, so my msn could work... lol.

and ive been pretty busy too.. so much backlog in work >.< nothing important the whole of last week, cept we got our prizes for OM.. lol.
then on sat, went to deecky's house to do POD... eeeeeh. his iBook is damn cool... i want! but hsi house damn far >.< went to cell late.
sunday had tuition.. learnt product and quotient rule for the first time... i am that behind in my work..

anyways.. it's confirmed! we're going US! whooo... and as a 7-men team too.. josh just joined... thigns are going to be rough, with all the new chnages and improvements for the world stage.. but we can do it guys!

then nothin much going on, cept the aircon had to break down.. during this hot season somemore.. ugh.

gotta do POD.. this sux.

mr. brightside

2005-04-17T14:43:00.000+08:00

i havent blogged for a very long time... OM took up my entire week. consistently left school everyday at 9.30 and ot home at 10.00 >.<

but it was worth it. we won =)

OM national champs for Prob 3, Div 3. and also Spontaenous Champions among div 3, probs 1,2,3.
somehow, the emotions of relief and thankfulness overshadowed that of joy. partially because we were deadset sure that RG would beat us for long-term (which they did by 12 points), but we were more than pleasantly surprised when we were overall champs. that was coz we owned in spontaenous with a calculated score of 100/100, while second place(RG) was a score of 60/100.
not bad i say. and to think we prepared our spontaenous round just by going through a few practice rounds, and the rest of the time playing Need for Speed Underground 2 in the compserv room.

after 4 long months of crap, running back and forth from dover market, late nights and glitter in your eyes. its all over. phew.

it was enjoyable. the time we spent together as friends and getting to each other better, albeit exposing some nasty sides once in a while.
it was fun, until i started having bad dreams of the long term problem going wrong every night the whole week before competition.
it was tiring, leaving school so late only to reach home and then go straight to sleep. i wake up the next day and i have to hand in assignments i've never remembered getting, much less complete them.
it was painful, sewing ****ing glittery pink things to pale purple things. and getting your fingers stuck to red silk coz of the leaking tube of super glue (the skin on the tips of my right fingers came off btw)
it was educational, learning stuff you never kenw about, for example: that "contact cement" is a misnomer; that even though "supaglue" is a tiny tube to begin with, it's actually half filled with air; that masking tape is heavily underrated; and that Epoxy Putty can solve most problems involving an umbrella and an aluminium pole.

and it was rewarding, watching 5 out of 6 AC teams emerge as champions. ACS(I) dominated div 2 and div 3, while div 1 had an ACS(J) champ and div 4 had an ACJC champ. it was pure AC ownage.
the other schools hate us. lol.

on the flipside, we lost AC rugby.. sigh.. tough luck guys. you guys did your best and nobody can deny that. tears can be shed, cheers can be shouted, but nothing can change that fact. cheer up! =)

anwyays. cut my hair, afro no more!

could this be the year AC arts get their due credits? hmm.

will i ever make it home?

2005-04-11T21:50:00.000+08:00

will i ever make it home - ingram hill

one week never blog.. stupid OM taking up so much time... been leaving school everyday around 8.30-9+

its crazy.... we've been spending too much time on props, and only managed to do our first full dress rehearsal today.. and only coz we also had to present to the senior admin today..

it was crap lah... completely owned by the sec 2 grp.. they're just too cute..

im too tired to blog about anything... so many things i want to say... all the retarded things in class these past few days, lee suan yew, napfa test, alpha course on saturday, combined service on sunday, project at marky's house...

ugh. i just wanna sleep.

but will OM turn out to be a dream, or a nightmare? at least the sleep will end soon...

swing swing

2005-04-05T21:46:00.000+08:00

all-american rejects - swing swing

whooooo! we got gold =)
feels wonderful..

so i survived my weekends with nothing but fluids, medicine, strepsils and lots of rest and prayer... and my voice recovered by saturday night! =D yay..

and then monday came.. went to school super nervous.. the choir performed in the morning for chapel.. it was ewan's idea as some sort of warmup thing... "the appetiser to the main course"..
so we performed and it was crap, to be honest. sunset was a horrid performance, esultate was not bad, and mamayog was just a bunch of nerves.. if we were judged for that performance, it would have been a low silver..
so it kinda woke us up for awhile, and to show how different we sounded with an audience due to nervousness and all.. so we kinda took notice of the effect of nerves to our voices and just did some minor cleanups to our notes..

and then it was SYF time.. ARGH. so damn nervous.. we took 10 minutes in the tuning room and did ok. we were focused, excited and raring to go...
we were the 11th choir on stage, and we rocked i think =)

sunset sounded much better =)
exsultate (from our best song) became our worse song, coz we sped up. and it was kinda messy..
mamayog was pure adrenaline. so fun! we didnt speed up much, and it was a tight performance!

so yea... we walked off the stage thinking that it was a confirmed silver, and we were super happy... (we were expecting low silver)
we stayed behind to watch 2 more choirs after us.. they were erm... bad. we know one of them got bronze or something..

so the sec4s and the madamz went to swensons at suntec for a "celebratory" lunch.. we were celebrating a good performance, and what we thought was a silver =)
then we ate and talked about choir.. we chose the name for this Choir Night 2005 (not confirmed), and basically talked about lots of stuff.. it was great, just being there with all the choir dudes.. kenneth, peter, jerome, bong, ivan, collin, chris, kaiheng, poh yee.. and even reggie was there too!
and then we jsut walked around with nothing much to do.. none of the movies ended before 5, so we couldnt watch.. anywhere else other than suntec meant taking a taxi.. pool was too far. arcade didnt allow us in coz of uniforms.. and kbox was erm.. lame.
so we jsut went macdonalds, got ice cream and talked some more... hahaha. damn lame topics, from jerome's gf (cough cough) to predictions for results (everyone said high silver, escpet pohyee who said gold =P)..
and then smses from friends in other school choirs came in, and come of them said we would get gold.. we were just "err... thats good"

then while we were leaving to the s'pore sonference hall to get out results, we kinda played an awful prank.. hehheh.. we told some people in choir we got bronze.. and they kinda believed it.. in 10 minutes, the madams got smses from people asking whether it was true... so we were kinda screwed for it.. luckily not many knew and fewer believed... we are such evil seniors.. lol

and then we sat in that stupid hall for half an hour waiting for the damn results and tearing our hair out.. and then they came in with a list reading it out... i was sitting next to kenneth and then i just started grabbing his arm, damn scared..

and then they announced (very slowly) that we got gold... and we were damn happy.. we just threw our hands up and went Yes! and siva was screaming.. damn retarded.

anyways... 5 schools with gold, 3 with honours... the rest silver, and 2 schools with bronze... about 30 schools in all that day...
getting gold is definitely beyond anything any of us expected.. we went there aiming for a silver, and we got a gold.. how wonderful =)

i guess they lowered the standards a bit this year, but a gold is still a gold!

and especially it being the SECOND gold the ACS choir has ever received in its entire history.. the first was in 1999, where it was TTBB.

i feel blessed..

thanx guys.. =)

always on my mind

2005-04-02T21:01:00.000+08:00

phantom planet - always on my mind

argh. so frustrating..

woke up on friday with a horrible horrible throat. i could barely speak.. told my mum, who didnt believe me, and sent me to school. but it got worse, and i was quite feverish.. headache and painful raw throat.

then decided to leave school halway coz i was too sick.. my parents didnt want to pick me up, and asked me to go see a doctor myself.. -.-' but i called my cell leader JT instead... called him at 9, and then i just fell asleep at the admin office until he came.. deecky was there the whole time too, even though i was halfsleeping.. thx =) then JT came around 10.45, where he brought me to the clinic..

turns out the nodules on the back of my throat were red and inflamed.. viral infection. >.< ugh.

so frustrated.. fell sick 4 days before SYF... incredibly discouraging, coz this is supposed to be the time where i give my 100% for choir... next time we meet is performance day itself: Monday..
i feel so horrible not being able to do anything...

saturday confirm silver liao.. i just hope we do our best and not getting anything below a mid-silver.

12-51

2005-03-31T21:06:00.000+08:00

12-51 - The Strokes

wah.. super cool guit riff..
anyway... couldnt blog yesterday coz the blogger server was down or something..

these few days, it seems like im judging how well my day goes by, by its productivity and my energy level at the end of the day..

well, these few days were super tiring. on monday, was staying late to do OM. was at choir first, and then it ended around 5 plus. then did OM, where we stayed back all the way til night in school. damn fun. was working with ian and daniel, and we were quite productive.. they both left at 7, so i was kinda the only one left in the entire school. continued working, and then cleared up. the place was a total junkyard when we were done, so i had to clean the mess, and organise our stuff. and i accidentally spilt blue paint all over the floor, so i had to turpentine it off... =P by the time i was done, it was around 8.30...

tuesday was same too. went for a bit of choir, then straight OM til 8.30.. i remember it being very cool, the way we were so engrossed with work until we didnt notice it was dark.. coz we worked in compserv room, where the walls were all darkish blue, and there was only 1 very small window. so we literally had no idea it was dark outside until we opened the door...
on monday, it was super scary, coz i was the only person in school except for one custodian.. and i was cleaning up and actually saw him turn off the corridor lights one by one... sec 1... sec 2... sec 3... sec 4... and then it was completely pitch black.. like absolutely dark! it was so nice.. being the only one in school... weird feeling, but a nice one..

then wednesday was my only day i got home early.. choir for 2 hours only, then got home at 5+. slacked around. then today had choir til 6, and then OM til 7.. full dress tomorrow! how stressful -.-'

anyways.. really tired today.. woke up with a very dry and painful throat, coz i didnt take care of it properly.. must be infection again... very PAIN in the morning... devoured 5 strepsils by noon.. then marky followed me to the matron to get some panadol.. at first i asked for codeine syrup, but she didnt want to give me.. lol.. she must think im some drug addict now..
then got better after the panadol... coz during POD, i was absolutely freezing, and i was feverish too..
then nothin much during the day, cept for langarts, which is always fun =)
and IHS, where we watched a lameass video from timlim. it was about foreign talent or something, but we didnt listen at all.. we spent half our time being retarded and shouting "ANGMOH!" whenever we saw someone who caucasian in the film (which was practically in every scene).
then had choir, which was painful.... my voice is now handicapped by quite a few semitones for my upper natural voice... couldnt reach the high notes for exsultate, and ewan made it worse by shifing it to a higher key. ugh.

i think the choir is doing fine.. we'll get a silver, i think... =)

beautiful day

2005-03-28T00:01:00.000+08:00

ah yes.. u2 =)

yes! its easter!

AND i changed my blog skin, which ive been intending to do forever. black and orange = super poser..

so retarded.. its midnight and i still havent finished my geog assignment. i should have done it in the afternoon.. but at least im 3/4 done.

anyway. lemme blog abt saturday. choir in the morning. sang for the first 2 hours, then went for OM. well, i technically didnt sneak out of choir for OM, but i didnt get offical excuse either. so i was shuttling back and forth for a while in between the KBL and compserv room (both are 5 metres apart). then i just scrammed out of choir around 11.

i think the choir people arent saying anything, but they're really really pissed. the sec4s too. bleh. sorry.

went dover market to buy OM stuff, fixed many impt props, so it was very productive. then went to church, and it was alright.

and 10 minutes ago, i was trying to tie-dye some shirts for OM. do you know how hard it is to tie-dye in secret?? with acrylics?? anyway, i didnt have any instructions and just fudged my way thru. turned out pretty well, and looked like an OK tie dye shirt, cept the green looks really ugly. and there were lots of it, so it kinda diffused outward... ugh.

but the hardest part is dryin it in secret... lemme keep thinking of a solution before it stains my floor....

and its only my 100th time im listening to och junfrun..thx again, lol.. =)

this is the last time

2005-03-25T19:11:00.000+08:00

sometimes, thinking too much scares me.

im not talking about the intellectual kind of thinking by the way. i would love to have the ability to spurn intellectual debates in my head, because i dont have it in the first place.

instead, when im alone, my mind fills with stupid worries, concerns and questions.. trivialities and peripherals. and they make me extremely irritable.

i think about choir and worry about our condition for syf. whether the juniors will stand up to the challenge. whether people will show up for rehearsal. whether ther exco is doing a good job. whether i am doing a good job.

i think about OM and i worry about the next meeting, where the progress isnt even ensured. i worry about the costumes which are half done, the props which are half done, the acting which is half done, and my team mates who are all half spent. i worry about the materials we have; whether its enough or if we need to buy more.
i worry about the performance for dharma on wednesday, and our nationals in 1 week. and i worry about wesley and when some miracle will happen.

and then i worry about my maths and my horrible grades. i worry whether ill have to change my math tuition teacher, coz i like my tutor alot. i worry about my other results, and what happened to my missing chem assignment that was nearly counted as zero. i worry about my weight, which dropped again and is a disgusting 44kg. i worry about how i appear in other's eyes, and i cant even begin on what to say about that. i worry about my friends; i barely have much to say to them anymore..

i worry about my parents and how the business isnt too hot. and i worry about my spiritual life...

and now im worrying that everyone who reads this post thinks im a neurotic psycho with anxiety disorders.

but im always thankful for the little miracles in my life.
i thank the friends i have in choir. i thank kenneth, for doing his best as a rockin prez. i thank the fun we've shared and how ill never trade it for anything in the world. i thank my juniors for the being their funny selves. and i want to especially thank the sec 3 choir members for remembering to bring their tubes of sec2 art acrylics!!! we ran out of paint for OM, and farlowe wouldnt sell us any. so i hit upon this creative idea of collecting paint from the choir members who dont want it anymore! (c'mon. say im good. =D)

i thank my team mates in OM who have working their butts off; for giving their heart to this project. =) i thank ms phuan who has been coming down to meetings and helping us, even though she was sick. i thank the meetings we've had, and how we've gone so far. i thank the times we've worked together late, camaraderie and all. and how the other day, when we were working until the sky was completely black and we didnt even know til we walked out of the room.

i am thankful for my body which is at least healthy, and doesnt have any ailments or aches. i am thankful for some of my other grades which im doing well, like lang arts. i am thankful for my friends, and how nerotic i'll be, they'll still stand by me. i am thankful that even though im not rich, im not poor too.

and i thank God it's friday.. =)

sigh. i dunno why i wrote all of that. maybe one day ill find out why it was so satisfying to write that all down.
anyway, a post that started off without a point and ending off without one. i am pro.

oh yea. i thank you for taking ur time to read that obscenely long pointless rant.

ransom letter

2005-03-22T20:54:00.000+08:00

i feel like crumbling.

monday. drong was retarded as usual. only functional features will be ready by the end of the year. like classrooms and such. the rest of the school will have to wait another year. drong is at his usual bullshit again.

then left school halfway for choir workshop thingy. got Mr Nelson Kwei to come and look at our choir. wow. nelson kwei ROCKS.
had him for last year's SYF, and he was an excellent conductor. still remember the retarded songs like Hish Whist... hahaa..
so he gave us some pretty good suggestions, like slight changes to style and dynamics. gave comments, which were rather ok. he said we were a silver choir, which i think is a little bit optmistic.

then after school was OM. i think everyone's really tired. everything about monday's OM was pure sluggish. Ugh. i dunno what to do with OM.

then today started off as a bad day. I stayed up late doing Math Assignments, coz marks would be keyed in today for term report. so i did ALL of my overdue work just for today. and then found out that chanwinhon wouldnt mark it, coz it was too late. I was DAMN PISSED.
i know its my fault thats its late, but he was the one who told me on Monday that i could hand in today. hours of hardwork, and he refuses to mark. i felt like screaming, honestly.
its just that i was so pissed that i spent so much effort, and it just meant nothing. ya know?

i have that very same fear for my choir and OM.

i mean, i can complain about how i have to work so hard for both. but so what if i give my all, sing my heart out for choir, only to get something horrible like a bronze? or stay back everyday to sweat, cry and bleed OM? and something tragic happening, like not even making past the nationals?

nobody's going to care if i did choir and OM 24/7...

if the result is a big NOTHING.

GAH. why does inadequacy and failure bring up so much ugly emotions..

anyway, choir today was.... tiring.
thats it. >.<

you dun have to pretend you care.

so much more inside

2005-03-20T12:07:00.000+08:00

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

i woke up and just realised it was sunday!

the last day of the holidays!

shit!

this is what an entire week of rushing from one place to another for commitments can do to you. honestly. i cant even think back and remember which days were which days. everything feels the same. i cant even distinguish day or night in my memories of this entire week.

my march holidays were spent:

choir, monday to friday, 9 to 5
OM, twice this week, which is VERY LITTLE COMPARED TO OTHER GROUPS WHO CAME DOWN EVERY SINGLE DAY.
not to mention oddities of other stuff i have to do.

i remember when i complained last year that i did practically nothing but stay at home and do work. this year, i cant even afford to stay at home and do work.

this sucks. bleed bleed bleed.

anyway. friday was choir fulltime. morning to night. crack.

saturday was a break form choir. came early to school for OM. but relised i was a little too early, so i went holland v for a while. OM was productive, but no as productive as i would have liked.
1 whole week of time. 7 oppurtunities for intense OM. but we chose 2 sessions of 3 hours for a bit of work.

last night, i thought about lots of stuff that happened this week before i went to sleep. not the boring events that ive narrated in this blog, mind you.
but just some comments or stuff that've people said to me this week. passing comments that seemed unimportant at that time. stuff people have said to joke around, but it seems so much more serious in retrospect. or even a look people have given.

i wish people would say stuff pointblank. then i wouldnt have to guess what you mean. misinterpretation can be very dangerous.

and i hate second guessing. its distracting.

untitled

2005-03-17T23:50:00.000+08:00

untitled - simple plan

haha.. the song is actually called untitled... =)

been dreading to blog actually. somehow trying to squeeze out coherent sentences from my tired head isnt easy. anyway, narrating my life's boring details is pretty draggy. and irksome, i bet. i cant even wax lyrical on some random topic that pops into my head. BLAH.

anyway. this entire week has been pretty bad. march holidays, with the long day and longer nights. monday, came for a bit of choir. like an hour's worth. mostly was shuttling between singing and painting for OM. OM was crapepy at first, then it got better. finished so much, feel sooo satisfied. the only thing i absolutely hated was that the stupid batik dye got onto my trusted nike shoes. its bright blue on the top part of my right shoe. and black paint on the heels.
paint was all over my hands too, and it was so gross. at least it prevented me from biting my fingernails for quite a while (haha).
after an entire morning of OM, stayed for another 3+ hours of choir >.< ended at 5

tuesday, had choir again. was dummmmbb. then left early with ivan, daniel, collin, stuart and ian for the london community gospel choir performance. were at the choc bar before that, and just talked cock a bit. but some awkward silences lah.. funny. then went library searching for choral scores.
the performance was.... wow. you definitely dun see it very often in singapore, coz ususally the audience (being typically s'porean) is very paiseh one. but the choir was like something that hopped out of sister act or something (without the cheesiness). very spiritually uplifitng, and the vocals were.. fantastic.
still need to get ivan his present. shucks.

then yesterday... went to school in the morning, supposed to go choir. but then olly held worship session, which took up the morning. i thot it was ok, since i could go for the afternoon part of choir.
but i forgot all about AEM.. ahhh.
i wasnt even dressed right. i looked to casual. but nvm, no time to change. so i just went to the place, which was an architect firm. whoaaa. very cool. same firm thats designing our new IB campus for ACS.
first, they kinda crashed coursed us abit on architecture. what they did, form vs function blah blah blah. then they showed us the same slides they showed Drong when they were selling their idea. wow. the school looks damn cool.
but then estimated cost by the architects? 59 million... -.-" wahlau.
according to them, Dr Ong said that it would be "no problem! we are ACS! we have no probs with the money!"

then went to josh's house to hang around for a while.. haha.

woke up today with a killer throat. all the late nights and not taking care of my throat took a toll on me. well, i think i could have dragged myself out for choir, but i was too tired. and too sian. basically stuck around the house with nothing better to do.

and i replaced my ipod! stupid battery defect. luckily got 1 year warranty, and apple's 1for1 policy. my brand new ipod.... =))

the dark of the matinee

2005-03-12T14:37:00.000+08:00

bleh. not many people have blogged about the cruise.
got alot to say, but not willing to type it all out.. haha..

emr the cruise was generally ok. but alot of free time. the activities were either too boring, or too short. lol.

i was rooming with ian cheong technically, but i think ive spent less than half an hour MAX in that room for the entire cruise. only when i bathe or when i pack/unpack. other than that, i was at other places.

erm. first night. explored around, then had briefing and vespers at the lido. our worship was quite bad. we were arguing at the last minute what songs we were goign to do 5 minutes before we started. and i found out i was supposed to sing just before it started.
whoa. so i froze up and was just looking generally bewildered. it ended, sounded pretty bad, and we were all bummed. then all of us went to the helipad to worship and pray. in the end, we were all quite comforted. we wanted to be more prepared and decided the songs beforehand. then while the rest went to play soccer or basketball, me, josh, poon and poh went to the lido to watch national treasure. i watched it before, but decided to tag along anyway. the movie ended around 2, and we wandered around and found the people coming back from their game. sat down, talked lots of bullshit. then had supper at some really rip-off place. $6 ice cream. wahlau.
then crashed at poon's room and fell asleep at the topbunk with marky.

erm. woke in the morning, tired with only 3 hours sleep. i was supposed to lead worship, so yea. kinda floundered around and freaked out. foudn out last minute about my repulsion with the mike.
somehow, (i dunno how) i get really nervous when i have to sing with this funny instrument in your hand that can pick up ANY flaw or mistake in your voice. and i have to make it look effortless with a smile.
it was scary to say the least, and the people were so bored. i was forever turning around to look at the band members and trying to make eye contact and telepathically going "help me! help me!"

ok i wasnt that bad, according to other people. but i felt terrible. i'm been in ACS choir long enough to perform and NOT feel like i screwed up.

then incredibly lame stuff inbetween morning and night. skip skip skip.

formal dinner. haha! thot i would be quite lame, but it was quite fun. everyone was dressed really formal and all. like the sec 1s had real shirts and suits and ties and all. i, on the other hand, screwed the "formal" part halfway. semi-formal? semi-casual? smart-casual? formal casual? bleh. whatever. at least i din need to bring an extra bag to fit some costume that i wear for less than 2 hours.
food was ok.
some people were asses. run to the manager and crybaby, just becoz we took your seat. nowords can describe your utter idiocy. nvm. because we moved to a bigger table, we could have none grp-members as company. who gives a shit about your fancy-schmancy-schmuck.

er-herm. anyway, took lots of lamer photos. i hope noone posts any photos of the cruise online. there are a lot of pictures of me that i dun wan people to see =(
then watched the stupid cabaret. incredibly third-class. so many mistakes in the stunts and no interesting element. fell asleep halfway.
then went helipad again. whoa.

then crashed at josh's cabin and fell asleep really quickly. resisted all attempts at waking up for breafast, woke up half an hour before worship. we prepared virtually nothing. but we prayed, and i thought it was the best out of all the days. (cept the one on tuesday with the full instrument setup) =P

nothing else. erm. we slacked, we packed, we ate, we left. thats it.

in all, the cruise was boring as hell, but the company was fun. hanging out with everyone and having stronger friendships.. =) worship was quite fun also. nothin else to say. bleh. bye.

as lovers go

2005-03-07T20:38:00.000+08:00

as lovers go - dashboard confessionals

ok. ive left this dead for so long.

i have survived slightly less than 2 weeks without my specs. im not even dead yet, from oncoming traffic which i cant see or anything.
the most frustrating thing ive found out about not wearing specs is that you can never see people's facial expressions. its like losing a sense organ.
and when your vision is slightly blurred, your mind seems to be blurred too. like everything around you is slightly slow, and you're feeling really dumb. tragic, huh.

at least i got my specs today. muahaha. no noticeable diff from my old one.

anyway. going to fail chem. going to fail amaths. whoopdeedoo.
crazy saturdays are becoming routine. woke up early for choir, which was ok. we dun sound crappy anymore, and we're dabbling in diff styles. mamayog sounded... good. cept the altos cant get the damn syncopation right when its so easy.
sunset is tri-lingual?!? weirdest song ever (after hist whist).
choir still got politics.. wahlau. im fully taking the stand of a third party. getting involved is nothing but trouble.
OM was cool. planned for a while. went to buy mroe materials for OM. excellent... =D
couldnt go for church AND tabernacle. sux.

then sunday was stupid. slacked arounda dn played FF8 whole day. middle of disc 3 now. overpoweredness. lol.

today was worship. we were horrible in the morning. then we got better. hahaa. i can say we are presentable tomorrow. =) pray that it will be good.
then went to daniel's house with ian to do chiense project. yay! i can say our project is pretty cool and quite fun. and that daniel... whalau. accepted a damn virus he got from his sis. and ran the program somemore. sent eveyr single on of his contacts the same virus. restarted the com as quickly as posisble, but the damage was done. after the com was started, bryan hooi and ben soh sent him the very same virus program. whoops. they got infected. dan is a damn champ.

went to get my specs today. still recovering from the aftereffects of my week-long blurredness. i actually heard the wrong thing to buy for my mum on the way to collect my specs. how did "BaZhang" turn out as "BaKua"?!?! omg... i bought 5 pieces of pork instead of 5 dumplings. DAMN. i had to pay the extra myself. (which isnt alot, but who the hell eats BaKua when its not CNY?? i have no idea what i was thinking when i tot it perfectly normal to buy BaKua now).

sheesh. need to finish chinese project now. and do my chem portfolio. ladeedaa.

where are you now

2005-03-02T18:57:00.000+08:00

michelle branch - where are you now?

i have no idea why people make such a huge fuss over my damn weight. its not as if im not trying to gain some..
for goodness' sake.. even the stupid guest-of-honour who was giving me my prize had something to say about my diminitive size:

"congratulations... you should gain more weight."

like.. WTF? talk about out-of-pointness.. gain weight and be as fat as you? -.-'
and i've got half the people i know, thinking im anorexic and wanting me to just admit it. i feel like puking (figuratively, idiots).
for your information, i have gained 4 kg in 2 months, and now im a (slightly) healthy 46kg.

whatever.
anyway. i received my prize for lang arts, which i think is a total fluke. tucky came up to me during the reception later, and congratulated me with much amusement in his tone. when i replied that he taught me well in sec1, he was chuckling a bit too hard. i didnt think it was that funny...
and erm.. before that was choir performance too. which was bad. we went several semitones flat, the sops were too fast compared to the rest of the choir and lower voices were a tad airy. so same old choir then. bleh.
after the founder's day stuff, went to jason's house and played PS for awhile, where i received the news that i got a B3!!! waHH!!!! im so damn happy. at least not a D or E which i imagined in my mind.. lol. (my parents want me to retake though. bleargh)
then went home, changed, and had worship band practice. heh.. so fun! slowly coming together...

then tuesday had founder's day celebration at SIS. damn waste of time. half the time was spent listening to each principal talk about the school's acheivements and what not. all 5 leh (acs international doesnt count) damn effing boring. should have ponned.
then went home, sand had tuition..

today was retarded as well. IHS test was... an MCQ?? physics test pretty much ensured noone would ever want to take it next year, unless they want single digit marks. RnJ was pretty cool too. haha. kia hua's question was super out of point. i mean.. DUH.

okk. gotta study for tomorrow's amaths and chem test. slacked too much liao..
and i gotta do my POD reflections too, or chinee will make me write another damn thesis. (i think she hates me)..

crumbs

2005-02-27T13:39:00.000+08:00

And if she doesn't go your way
Look up to blue skies and say hey! It's okay, It's okay

wargh.

yesterday was craziness. woke up early in the morning, only to receive sms from phuan to see me immediately for aem.. pftt. i was half asleep and had to drag myself out..

then went for choir, where we werent too bad. tenors and basses > sops and altos. mucked around a bit, and did more stuff to the website. jerome wants a tagboard.. haha..

and then went to alvron studio to pracice for worship band. we couldnt find the place at first, and had to wander around aimlessly in the *very* hot weather. finally found the dman place, but it was booked. so we booked a later time slot and while we waited, we went to my place to discuss for a while.
anyways, the studio was very cool, with the funky lighting and all. by that time, mark had to go liao, and ian cheong couldnt come. so it was just josh, poon, song, jason, jeremy and me. we din have a keyboard, our drummer was gone, half the songs werent even decided, and people din know what they were going to do for performance.
anyway, we din get much done.. at least we know what not to do the next time.

bleargh. i wanna play bass guit.. bass guit is so much mroe fun! but that will mean i will have to learn everything in such a short period of time. i shouldnt be so selfish, especially since the worship band cant afford people learning how to play insturments last minute. lol.. so im stuck with backup singing... haha! =P

then went to church, where i was kinda tired. amazing how JT's cell meetings somehow always manages to be in line with the week's message. hmm.
then went to kallang theatre to watch Magic of Love! anyway. there was this whole miscommunication prob. JT had me and jason's tickets, but din know it was for us, so he accidentally sold it away. he even left without us.. -.- me and jason had to take a very (expensive) cab ride from bukit merah to kallang.
so we got there and foudn out that we din have our tickets anymore... but then JT managed to get for us compimentary tickets.. it wasnt the $10 tickets we bought, but complimetary $68 dollar tickets!
it was good lah, coz since we sat in front, i din have to worry abt not seeing anything without my specs! =D

and that jason snuck his burger and fries in my bag! the smell of oil was wafting from it during the entire performance. and we were sitting next to the kallang theatre mangement people somemore.

anyway, the most surreal thing and incredibly dumb thing happened to me after the show. im just so thankful my HCL lessons have equipped me with relatively adequate conversing skills in my mother tongue. pfft.

ok. start on hw now! gogo!

gravity

2005-02-25T22:57:00.000+08:00

pretty cool song we did for LA(B) analysis.

i love this song. really i do. so i thought id do quite well for this assignment, since ive heard it a dozen million times. but then, when it came to writing out the actual analysis, i was pretty stuck..

i dun know why, but everything i wrote just sounded stupid. this doesnt usually happen to me in my lang essays, but it just did.
well, this song has a lot of meaning.. but you cant really tell it from lyrics. its the tune, the way the song is sung, and not just the lyrics. somehow, quoting from the lines and all that didnt seem very right.
i guess sometimes my own words fail me in capturing the right feelings or emotions for the song. it was so melancholy and sad, and i couldnt write it all down in words, and "substantiate with quotes" or soemthing.. it was just stupid.

anyway. words do seem to have failed me many times these past few days. i seem to have been too brash with words recently.. ive been too harsh and critical of people who dun deserve it. too flippant with sarcasm. too casual in statements.. to quite alot of people too. i just want to say sorry...
possibly its just a way of my irritation of showing. or it could be the rashness of getting somehting done. or it could be my hurried dismissal of things i find unimportant.

i just wish i had more time to think before i say stuff.

anyway. im still in my schl uniform..got home abt an hour ago.. school has been ok.. stayed back to do OM, from end of school all the way to 6. quite good progress. had cell, which was good.then ate dinner with some members of cell.
bleh.
worship is coming along fine, other than the fact that we have no place to practice...... sigh. pray for a time where we can finally practice. we want to make worship good..

i need to bathe and sleep now. im in a semi-conscious state now. half the stuff i typed on msn and on this post are incoherent gibberish. like this. im going. bye.

more than words

2005-02-23T20:16:00.000+08:00

extreme - more than words

filled in my stupid subject combinations any old how.

English HL
Chem HL
Maths HL
Bio SL
Econs SL
Chinese B SL

now that i think about it, they were really stupid choices. maths HL? what was i thinking?? and bio? i have to score well this year to be able to take it. and when bill chia was talking about people who shouldnt take chem HL, i had the vague feeling i was one of people he mentioned..

i have done the choir website. design anyways. the content is bare minimum, but good enough. you all better check it out NOW. muahaha. and gimme commentss..

bleh. school was very stressful. omg, 4 tests next week? plus two upcoming performances? and OM breathing down my neck like a constant reminder? i have every reason to go psycho. like scream in the middle of assembly and hurl myself off the corridor to the rocks near the amphitheatre. whoa. that was an overly graphic imagery..

broke my specs today. like i dunno how i did it. but i got owned somewhrer at the centre part, and the left lens popped out. it happened during maths, and i was like "omg?". i gotta get new specs, but convincing parents to get me contacts. i want contacts...

got home relatively early. to find my sisters with friends over, coz scgs had a damn holiday today and yesterday. staff seminar or soemthing. lucky buggers. watched my sis have her OM. (yea, compulsory OM for sec2 level, like our Sec1 EP) her group was so fun and all.. cutesy and very un-serious. not like my OM, where im so freakin stressed. couldnt help drawing comparisons..
lol. dun worry. im not regretting doing OM. mines is fun too, but not really good coupled with OM and work and all..

oh well. being chased out now. gotta go..

i lub my guit. <3

everybody hurts

2005-02-22T20:16:00.000+08:00

everybody hurts - the corrs

bleargh.

school was fun today, at first. everything was ok and quite fun. then school ended, and i had to attend the stupid prize-presentation rehearsal, and choir practice and OM meeting.
it was crazy. the rehersal was dumb, so i ditched it pretty much most of the time. and then went for a bit of choir.

omg we sounded so terrible. i dun want to talk about it.

then had OM meeting, which was quite fruitful. though everyone was really tired.. discussed, planned, and troubleshooted many stuff. stuff are brightening up a tad bit.
then went back to choir. we kinda got our act together, and managed to sound quite nice.

bleh. sorry if this post is so boring, but im really tired. shuttling back and forth between so many things.. made me realise how i cant really split myself into 3 clements and do so many different things at one time. also made me think about my priorities.

one of the questions that bothered me the whole day, was something like this: if i had my SYF competition, OM competition and major exam on the exact same day, and i could only go for one. which one would i go for?

i really dunno the answer.

anyway. someone today casually mentioned that i was "weird". hmmm. wierd? i dunno. a bit quirky, mebbe. but weird? hmm. weird good or weird bad?
someone said i was weirder in sec1 and sec2. someone said the exact opposite.

whatever. mebbe i am slightly different from the person i was in sec1 or sec2... but weird is as weird gets. so who cares?

[edit] omg. i forgot to eat lunch. i was so busy, i forgot until now.

dig in

2005-02-21T19:14:00.000+08:00

dig in - lenny kravitz

gah. the pressure is on.

not only do i have to commit myself to my ever-increasing pile of homework, i have to contend with my other commitments..

choir. is. crap.
no really, we are. i dunno what is wrong. there's no specific problem, but we're just bad. the sec 1s and 2s dun know half their notes (as i found out to my shock when i tested one sop individually).
and there are some that are just not realy good at singing. like theres this dude who cant sing in tune, but got into choir by some miracle. i dun know how to tell him he's terribly out of tune... a bit blunt right?
and there's not jsut the musically inept. theres the disciplinary prolbems too. like sec1s who stuff blutack into keyholes? and choir rehearsal so chaotic, we can never get anything done right.. kenneth has to shout so many times, which is so unlike him. upper sec know that when kenneth is angry, its a pretty rare occasion and we know that there must be somehting serious enough to make him angry. but the sec1s know no fear.... gah.
and we're so demoralised.. lets not talk about SYF, which by the way, is around 2 months away.. lets talk bout founders day, which is 2 weeks away. omg... we are so effing screwed. i dunno whether we perform for ACS(I) or for everyone in indoor stadium, but who cares. a bad performance is humiliating regardless of the audience.
i am praying for a miracle. at this standard, we wont even get bronze.

and OM. argh..... internal competition, is what, late march? thats ONE MONTH. ONE FREAKIN DEECKIN MONTH to finish
Script
Props
4 Backdrops
Costumes
Casting
and all our acting.

OMG. it is not posible. NOT possible. what a gargatuan task to complete. oh God, save me. and effing wesley wont even come for OM.

and we got our subject combi choices today. what the hell am i supposed to choose?? i am so NOT going to major in sciences, because my performance in sciences are always stranglely fluctuating. ditto maths.
thats a *no* for the bio-medical and chemistrymajiggy field stuff. and i dun wan to be an architect or an engineer. that prob leaves, like journalism or law.
but for journalism, i need to do a Higher Level for history. and i hate history. i cant seem to score well.
and for law.. well.. i cant picture myslef as a lawyer. so there.

or maybe medicine? ill be taking a huge risk majoring science. and taking Bio, which i didnt take for sec3 and sec4.

this is so stupid.

im going to finish the effing OM script, then do chinese. then chem prac writeup.
who cares about my subject options? lets just jump off a building.. lemme find another 14 students who will join me, and then they'll let me do it.

the truth

2005-02-16T19:18:00.000+08:00

delted the previous post. hope noone saw it.. depression brings out a very ugly side of me..

anyway. these few days have been confusing. constantly switching between happy and sad. usually switches in between periods. (class periods, idiot)

so i constantly muck around in school and look quite glum. why i was depressed in the first place i dun even know. gah.

anyway. i have decided that today, i shall start on homework. i havent bothered to do it in ages. especially all my chinese and maths.. gah.. now i have a backlog of work that extends to 1 month ago. sigh.

i intend to finish differentiatino, loci assignment and circle theorem by friday. (i havent done all 3. gd luck to me). and mebbe my chinese book reports.. hehheh.

i am determined. and if it means no sleep so be it..

shit. i have a headache. this is not good.

The Truth - Good Charlotte
So here we are
We are alone
There’s weight on your mind
And I wanna know
The truth, if this is how you feel
Say it to me
If this was ever real

I want the truth from you
Give me the truth, even if it hurts me
I want the truth from you
Give me the truth, even if it hurts me
I want the truth

So this is you
You're talking to me
You found a million ways to let me down
So I'm not hurt when you're not around
I was blind
But now I see
This is how you feel
Just say it to me
If this was ever real

I want the truth from you
Give me the truth, even if it hurts me
I want the truth from you
Give me the truth, even if it hurts me

I know that this will break me
I know that this might make me cry
You gotta say what’s on your mind
On your mind
I know that this will hurt me
Break my heart and soul inside
I don’t wanna live this lie

I want the truth from you
Give me the truth, even if it hurts me
I want the truth from you
Give me the truth, even if it hurts
I don’t care no more, no
Just give me the truth, give me the truth
Cause I don’t care no more
Give me the truth
Cause I don’t care no more, no
Just give me the truth
Give me the truth
Give me the truth
Give me the truth
Give me the truth
Cause I don’t care no more, no

positivity

2005-02-13T23:14:00.000+08:00

i havent blogged in a week. no time.. and couldnt be bothered to update anyway coz i dun think anyone comes here in the first place.
lets just start by saying:

shit.

yea. i cannnot believe how fast the days have went by! i havent done a single bit of work. come to think of it, its not only this cny break ive been a slacker, but the whole year
like omg... my december holidays chinese assignement is not even half done. and every single math assignment since the beginning of the year has not been touched.
and its just FEBRUARY!
i worked so hard last year, and was still so-so only. ive slcaked so much, i dun think ill survive this year.

im so dead.

anyway. CNY has been ok. started off pretty psyched abt it. but then it just turned to be pretty dull.

after chinese new year clebrations, which was very kitsch. then went with poh and josh back to nanhua. it was quite lame, coz we waited very long for a cab, and when we went, most of the teachers had already left. i dun mean that the teachers left for home, but i mean the teachers left the school. the bleddy HOD of gep wasnt even a teacher that existed when i was p6.
then again. that was 5 years ago.
then ate lunch with hoe and poh (heehe. rhymes), plus a few pri schl ppl. had a very "intersting" conversation. disturbing to say the least.

then had reunion dinner. blah. nothing to say about it. cept i ate a lot of fishballs. whoppee

then next few days visit people. all my cousins and whatnot on wed and thur. ditto, nothing to say either. cept i learned how to play mahjong. and im not bad actually. except i get confused between the number of bamboos and dots. wahlau.. at least draw them with the same number arrangemts lah.
also looked thru some pics of myself at my cousins house. i was around 9 years old. i had really big ears and big eyes. or mebbe i just had a really small head. either ways, i looked like a monkey. plus, i never look at the camera when my photo is being taken. hmm. my cousin said i looked very dreamy. or just very distracted by my imaginary friend... =)

then friday was school holiday. nothing happened actaully. planned to go wacth constantine with josh and jed and a few other people. but then foudn out that i had dinner appointment with relatives. didnt think i could reach home on time if i watched a movie. anyway, josh wasnt coming.. so i played lan instead. abt 1 hour + only so i could get home on time.
had dinner with my mum's friends. we all had red wine. my mum had less than me, and actually got drunk. spouted alot of nonsense about me and my sis in front of relatives. needless to say we were pissed.

saturday. people came over to our house. i felt damn dao, coz i didnt talk to most of them. and i was tired, coz i was playing FF8 the night before till 3. and reading the artemis fowl book i borrowed from waasley.

didnt do much today either. except song came over in the mornign to do erp. laadeedum. our poster looks super cool. =D played ff8. middle of disc 2 liao. pretty fast, eh?

other random stuff to add:
- OM is coming along fine. yay!
- nehnehnail is stalking my sis. she even had to change her blog address. NNN, if you are reading this.. STOP! my sis is very freaked out! =)

- valentines day. sigh.

my mum is pissed. yikes.
bye.

Positivity - Suede
You say what you want to say
Your diamonds are drops of rain
Your smile is your credit card
Your currency is your love

And the morning is for you
And the air is free
And the birds sing for you
And your positivity

You play where you want to play
On the main streets where the creeps all prey
And you can feel like you're in dynasty
You could be what you want to be

And the morning is for you
And the air is free
And the birds sing for you
And your positivity

And the cars crash for you
And the sunshine is free
And the sirens call you

Yes, the morning is for you
Yes, the air is free
Yes, the world spins for you
And your positivity
Positivity

rain down

2005-02-07T23:21:00.000+08:00

just finished oedipus rex assignment!!! Wooohoooo..

whalau. so tired these days. no time to blog =P

staurday and sundey had choir camp. VERY FUN. bitterswert, coz it'll be my very last camp in choir =(
choir camp tradition is usual training and all that, then day games and night games. this year they shortened it a bit, but it was still fun.

err. saturday, i arrived early. introductions, admin, usual camp stuff. then after that went down to ivan's class with bong and played around with his super funky electric guiar. omg. it is so fun to play electric guit. fiddle around with the amp and stuff. just wow.
we did this for kind 3 hours, and missed mr Kam's training. ahah.. then we mac's for lunch. then while the lower sec were having performance workshop, i went to meet roy for oedipus rex project. i brought my laptop specially for oedipus rex assignemnt, so we were at the SAC doing work. quite fun. did lots of work, surpisingly, and played abit too.. lol..
then went back to choir camp. had day games. nearly won, but wesley beat everybody.. -.-' games were ok lah. was fun for a while, but then a bit boring not long after that. we were too tired to do the lame forfeits.

and then we had more training. the sec4s met and did more plannign for night games. it was an Ocean's 12 theme. but we chanegd it to Ocean's 69. haha... we had like videos and everything to intorduce the storyplot and all. VEYR COol. we opened with this damn funny clip witht the Ocean's Team stealing the crystal eggs or seomthing. damn funny. then the story goes that we come back and find that the eggs we just stole were fake.. cliche right... well someone stole the eggs before us, and left a series of clues to lead us to it.
so it began around 9.45 at night, and the whole place was like, pitch black. very fun. i remember we were hanging around outside waiting for the rest of the choir to be released to play, and we were talking. we waited 3 long years, and finally got to do our own night games. and after this, it would be over. *sniffle* our last choir camp. out last night games, planning or pariticipating. sigh..

but then the gmaes started and it was super fun. i am unbeatble at getitng caught! but i gave up in the end coz it was so boring. so i just let them catch me and i made them do forfeits in echaneg for clues. so it was treaure-trail,scavenger-hunt thing in the dark. fun.
not enough space to describe forfeits. but us sec4s definitely stretched our creativity =P
then ended around 1.30 . stayed back for awhile and cleared stuff out. played liero against pohyee, with all the action being shown on the scren. owned him in front of eveyrone to see on the projector =P

then the sec4s got our own room and played card and com games on laptops and all that. slept around 4 or soemthing. woke at 7.
played guit a bit more. than the whole choir had some impromptu performance and all that.. very fun.

then played bball abit. i am satisfied that im not as noobish as i thought. veyr noob, but not pathetic. lol =P
then ate at KAP with bongg.

fell asleep in the middle of showering. can you believe it?

today, was ok. quite sian. chem test was ok. i knew the 2nd cation, but didnt put it down. wahlau. wasted man.
and then basically slacked around. convinced mervyln goh to let me and song do pairwork for ERP.
then after school has OM.
Great Job guys! it was just veyr good time. very fast, very efficient. we just zipped through our backdrop, and we got in down faster than anyone though we would. and the backdrop looks veyr preeeetyyy. =D

okok. mebbe i go pay ff8 now. thx hongyi!!

byee...

Delirious? - Rain Down
Looks like tonight, the sky is heavy
Feels like the winds are gonna change
Beneath my feet, the earth is ready
I know its time for heaven's rain, it's gonna rain
It's gonna rain, again

Cos it's living water we desire
To flood out hearts with holy fire

Rain down all around the world we're singing
Rain down can you here the earth is singing
Rain down my heart is dry but still I'm singing
Rain down rain it down on me.

Back to the start, my heart is heavy
Feels like it's time, to dream again
I hear your voice, and yes I'm ready
To dance upon this barren land
Hope in my hands

Do not shut, Do not shut, Do not shut the heavens
But open up, open up, open up our hearts

Give me strength to cross the water
Keep my heart upon your altar
Give me strength to cross this water
Keep my feet don’t let me falter

yellow

2005-02-02T22:02:00.000+08:00

i wonder if people are tired of me posting lyrics on my blog entries. they do take up alot of useless space, doesnt it? but at least entries placed side by side are not as irritating as scrolling vertically.... or the page will be super long..

sigh anyway. didnt go to school day. was sick.. woke up with a slight fever and inflamed tonsils. typical throat infection. yech.
stayed at home and rested alot. then did a bit of work.

then i remembered that the OM group was going to buy props and materials today.. and that i had all the money... -.-"
so i had to get of the house for OM. bought lots of cloth from clementi, and paint from dover. then went to school. met lots of people, and they all said i ponned school. i was really sick! but they dun believe.
and ivan is pissed coz i missed his pizza thing.

planned with wes and ian, then began to paint. we only did a fifth of what we were supposed to do, and i dun think it will turn out right. in the first place, paint and cloth dun really mix. and oil paints and acrylics mixed together is super gross. talked to ms phuan after that and decided that it was going to be a bad idea, and we needed to come up with soemthing better that requires less time and looks better.

boo. im skipping lots of details abt OM. cant reveal too much. got competitors who read my blog!! *cough* collin *cough* jkjk

lol..

i cant wait for choir camp. even though the sec1s are bratty. gonna be fun.

i like coldplay.. even when they used to release songs they didnt make much sense in the past

Yellow - Coldplay
Look at the stars,
Look how they shine for you,
And everything you do,
Yeah they were all yellow,

I came along
I wrote a song for you
And all the things you do
And it was called yellow

So then I took my turn
Oh all the things I've done
And it was all yellow

Your skin
Oh yeah your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
D'you know you know I love you so
You know I love you so

I swam across
I jumped across for you
Oh all the things you do
Cause you were all yellow

I drew a line
I drew a line for you
Oh what a thing to do
And it was all yellow

Your skin
Oh yeah your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
D'you know for you i bleed myself dry
For you i bleed myself dry

Its true look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you
look how they shine
look at the stars look how they shine for you

iris

2005-02-01T23:34:00.000+08:00

sigh. another week of school.

incredibly tiring for me.

yesterday was monday. chem prac was dangerous. cracked 4 out fo 5 testtubes. heard that 4.10 suffered more "casuaties" though. then in physics prac played around with batteries.. connected 6 2V batteries and formed this super hot solder that burned thru paper. very cool.

other than that, pretty much dull.

oh yea. then went home and tried to do work. but just couldnt. just stared at my maths and felt really sorry for myself. i cant believe i wasted so much time.
then. ran around my estate. 3.1km in 17 minutes. incredibly slow. i want to do under 12minutes for 3.1km by june. gotta long way to go..

anyway. went back home, and tried to do more work. somehow ended up sleeping. dun ask me how. i just ended up in bed the next morning still wearing my running stuff and even my socks. i dun even know how i crawled into bed.

anyway. today was ok as well. super tired, and coz i fell asleep accidentally, i started studying for today's chem test in the car. it wasnt very bad. can do quite well i think.

then no other subject was especially interesting. though IHS was quite good, partially because chirnside does a very good job. compared to..
err. langarts, we wached baz lurhman's.. and for maths, we did usual stuff. and loo wasnt here today. so free periods!

then. stayed back after school to film stuff for night games. we are 4/5ths done. great job guys. anyway. we stayed back all the way until 7, when choir was supposed to start. there was a bit of confusion and misunderstanding between the sec4s and the madams. >.< long story. dun ask.
then choir rehersal in school form 7pm to 8.45. took a bus to S'pore Conference Hall for "soundcheck". basically to familiarise oursleves with acoustics and test our sound. we soudned... weird. we have a very very long way to go. we better get some stuff down during choir camp. sigh.
choir ended at 10.30. finally stepped home at 11+... ouch. super tired.

sigh. choir discipline is disgusting. the sec1s are a handful. some are incredibly irritating. but some are just downright rebellious. like, sec4s ask to keep quiet, and the sec1s will wave the finger at you. i even caught this sec1 trying to stuff blu-tack into the keyhole, just coz we asked him to step outside for a few minutes while we had an exco meeting.
disgusting i tell you. lectured them abt discipline on staurday liao, but they are even worse today. half an hour to shuttup and sit down? wtf... kenneth had to shout 5 times thruout the entire rehearsal. and kenneth rarely shouts even once.

disgusting....

oh yea. billpill and chanwinhon both read blogs. dun think ive written anythign bad abt them. have i?

i dun want to think liao. argh.

gonna start work now... >.<

Iris - Goo Goo DollsAnd I'd give up forever to touch you
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

[ Chorus ]
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything seems like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know your alive

[ Chorus x2 ]

I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

firewater

2005-01-29T23:09:00.000+08:00

my nose feels funny. sniff.

friday was fun.. usually is, since its the day before the weekend.. =P ncc was ok. had AGM, and a bit of planning. deecky also did a speech! though it wasnt a very good one. not his fault though.... good job anyway!
ncc ended around like, 7... spasticated 5 day week. and i thought it was a good idea when they propsoed it.

and its not as if i get to slack during saturdays. im so busy the entire weekend.. >.<

woke up really late this morning.. should have slept earlier. choir started at 9.30, and i was going to be late. so i called them and said i would be there at 10.. but then the stupid 74 took close to half an hour to come, so i gave up and took a cab instead. sigh.

then did some pretty funky filming for choir night games. haha. quite funny for some parts. choir is coming along pretty fine now. i have faith..

then had worship and bible study with olly and nehnehnail. we were the only people there.. -.-' but nevermind. numbers dun really matter. had a pretty good time. then went to church. quite tiring. speaker was quite good too..
turning mistakes into miracles, messes into masterpieces and obstacles to oppurtunities!

alitteration!

...

i have this really weird hunch that bill pill reads our blogs. the other day, i was walking along the corridor, and greeted billpill. then he said "hello, clemmy".

-.-"

i was like.. wtf?!? clemmy?!? yea, some people call me that for fun, but billpill made it sound so gayish. argh.

mebbe one day i'll greet him as billy for fun.

hmm.

this si a funky song by yellowcard... mmm.. starting to become my favourite band liao. and if you know me well enough, i have no strict favourites at all.. freakish.

only comes in acoustic version, but sounds very "yellowcard" anyway... sigh.

Firewater - Yellowcard
You sat me down beside myself
To show me all the reasons I was wrong for you
Was this for real? It's hard to tell
'Cause it was such a beautiful mess we had got into

I'm gonna overcome this paper heart and win this time
And all along, I should've known this wasn't your dream, it was mine
I know you wanted me to give up this life to be
Everything I was back when you had the hands my heart was in
I was never good at goodbye

[ chorus ]
Can I swallow this bottle whole?
So, this brain in my head
Can forget your face
'Cause I'd rather be dead
Then make more mistakes

When we were starting out, you believed in me without a doubt
You were the finest thing to happen to a boy like me
It's so much harder, now, I wanna try and tell you how
There is so much love in me, even though it's hard to see
I was never good at goodbye

[chorus]

Today I couldn't stay awake
Feels like I'm drowning in this firewater lake
I won't be sleeping much tonight
It's not the same without you lying by my side
Right beside me

[chorus]

I know you wanted me
To give up my life to be
Everything I am, when you're the
Only thing that I can see
I'm sorry, but you're not the
Not the only one for me

(So this brain in my head can forget your face)

You left me, here, beside myself
Left me with all the reasons I was wrong for you.

flavour of the week

2005-01-27T21:01:00.000+08:00

shit. theres like so much work to do. i cant believe i left it to *now* to start doing >.<

i feel like a damn slacker. and this year is not a good year to slack off..
gah. i feel terrible. my brain is too numb to even string a coherent blog entry.. my throat is dry and painful. my nose is blocked. and i feel so drained.... can die man.

this is getting really hard.

im gonna just blog about whatever comes into my head.

about school... going by ok... barely scraping by..

having trouble with physics. argh... its so -bleh- in class all the time. jason chan is a super ncie guy, but not a very good teacher. its prob my fault for not being a very good student in his lesson, but its really hard to concentrate. hes just too ncie a teacher...
oh yea.. and lang(a).. merv gave up 4.10 for 4.9 .. which was incredibly warped, coz i had the impression she'd give up our pretty hopeless class. pleasently surprised...
and oh man... maths... chan win hon is *the* weirdest teacher yet. he looks really blur and all, but hes really quite smart. and he does the cheesiest things ever, like declaring loudly that "MATHEMATICS IS AMAZING". or somethinglike that. cracks us up, but maths is really quite dull. i cant do anymroe classwork. i just cant >.<

oh yea. just remebered.. IHS debate today. super funny. we din prepare at all, and still won. dun ask how. i dunno either.

anyway. had choir today. we got 2 new teachers. mr something tan and mr ferdinand quek. or issit kwek. i dunno. anyway. they are quite alright, though the mr tan is really really weird. like whacko jacko weird. but seems quite nice... hm... the mr quek/kwek is quite a cool person. first impression was that he was quite bossy, but a pretty funky guy. not many people are comfortable with the way he does thigs, but he works the tenors and basses better than ewan ever can. possibly coz hes a guy and knows guy voices better...
and choir camp is 1 week away. night games will be planned by us. expect somehting totally funky.

and in other out-of-point stuff, i grew from 42kg to 43 kg, which still leaves me in the category of "freakishly anorexic". im gonna to swallow buckets of lard until i turn fat or something.

its close to 10, and im gonna start homework soon. like, my physics alt assignment or somehting. damn damn damn...

sigh.
bye.

Flavour Of The Week - All American Hi-Fi
She paints her nails and she don't know
He's got her best friend on the phone
She'll wash her hair,
His dirty clothes are all he gives to her
And he's got posters on the wall
Of all the girls he wished she was
And he means everything to her

Chorus:
Her boyfriend, he don't know
Anything about her
He's too stoned, Nintendo
I wish that I could make her see
She's just the flavour of the week

It's friday night and she's all alone
He's a million miles away
She's dressed to kill
But the TV's on
He's connected to the sound
And he's got pictures on the wall
Of all the girls he's loved before
And she knows all his favourite songs

Repeat Chorus

Yeah

Her boyfriend, he don't know
Anything about her
He's too stoned, he's too stoned
He's too stoned, he's too stoned

Repeat Chorus

Yeah she's the flavour of the week
But she makes me weak

radio song

2005-01-24T20:13:00.000+08:00

sigh. i like jet. its a super funky band, but i like their slow songs better.. i think its better than their fast ones..

today was abit of a dead day for me. just felt really stoned and daod-ed.. combination of factors really. dun really feel like talking about it. its just really one of the days where you feel like hiding in your shell, and you can let the world pass you by. like stone in the corner and think about stuff, until your head hurts so much you fall asleep.

sheet. omg.

something completely surreal just happened to me. like weirdish. like freakish. like super crazy whacked..

im still reeling. ask me abt tomorro.. AAAHH..

Radio Song - Jet
Take a look
At what I took
A leaf out of everybody's book
We see what you can't see
I'm caught in a trap of my own
Like everybody I know

This won't be played on your radio tonight
This won't be played on your radio tonight
This won't be played on your radio tonight

Do you all know
Of the emperor's clothes
Walking down an empty road
We see what you can't see
That's not how I wanna be
Anyhow, everytime, the same dream

This won't be played on your radio tonight
This won't be played on your radio tonight
This won't be played on your radio tonight

This won't be played on your radio Show
This won't be played on your radio tonight (oh no)

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na

dancing in the moonlight

2005-01-22T21:40:00.000+08:00

hey... im back from LDP camp! okok, so i got back on thursday.. but i was too tired, forgive me lah..

anyway. lets start from day 1..

DAY 1
erm. so we assembled early morning in school. then took a 2 hour bus ride to Kluang, Malaysia. the "animal research institute" is really a hyped up term for "farm". lots of cows and horses and stuff.
oh yea! wesley had to answer the call of nature in the bus... in a ziploc bag... HAHAH.. grossness..
then we went to the campsite itself. was pretty cool. MUCH MUCH better than kota tinggi. the tents were also pretty funky. was tenting with roy, mun, song, mark, mingyi and darren chew. in this cool looking hexagonal tent. first day didnt really do much, just the usual team stuff, like coming up with identities and cheers.
ohoh. we also had some ropes and knots lesson. super easy. but the dude, anthony, who was giving the lesson was dman funny. hes the kind who opens his eyes really big when he talks animatedly. very cartoonish, but the friendly kind, not the freaksih kind... lol.. O.O
then at night, we had some night walk. walked around an area of the camp, in some freaky jungle and out again. it was pitch dark and they didnt allow us to use torchlights. not very scary lah, but you can almost picture some pontianak hanging from one of the trees. freeeaky.
oh yea. the food was good =)
did night patrol also. sat around watching kiahua and jason play chinese chess. cant remeber who won. lol.. and also listened to justin's lameass pink ping pong ball story. wahlau...

DAY 2
ok day 2 was pretty ok. didnt really sleep well the night before. we all decided to sleep with our heads to the sides of the tent, and our legs in the middle. but then some of us were taller than others, so some people eventually ended up with feet stuck in their faces.. >.<
okok. first we had rafting in this pool of shit. im really serious. like REAL shit. its this sewage treatment pond or some sort. using PVC pipes, barrels and rope, we constructed this raft thingamagig. we also conructed our own paddle (lol) which didnt workout quite well. eventually,we got across tothe other side, but smelled alot like shit. poo.
lunch!
then we had canoeeeing. wheee. canoed quite a few times during ncc liao, so it was pretty funky, and not very difficult. canoed with deecky!! quite funny to see people who dunno how to steer, navigate around in the open water.. but i got try to help help a bit lah. where go so evil one.. =P eventually noone capsized.. yay!
we then went to some ulu corner beside the lake to start our survival thing. the scenario was that we were stranded for 48 hours and that we had use items to survive. i filled the drinking canteen with the dirty river water, which got the anthony dude kinda worried. said that if i never wash properly, and someone drink from it, he will come look for me. and then he did his super big eye thing at me again. O.O
super freaky. i washed it in the end =P

went back to camp incredibly sunburnt on the back of my neck and nose... ouch.

DAY 3
and today was TOH'S BDAE!! whoo..
anyway, for day 3 we had some lame find the pendant kind of activity. quite fun at first, but got dumb very quickly. eventually, our group which was supposed to find 7 pendants, found only 4. we were very discourages, coz we thought we were very lousy. until we discovered when we went back that we were actually one of the better ones.. lol. i think we all blind lah. people can find 27 out of 30, we only got around half.
and then, we climb this super funky mountain called gunung lempang i think. was super steep at the end, but we all made it, including kaleni and niche koh.. yay! 501m from the base to peak! then when we went down, chinee and bill pill treated us to icecream. yumyum.
okok. then had bbq dinner, which was overrated.

then had campfire which was DUMB. okok. it wasnt dumb. just cliche. typical c-a-m-p-f-i-r-e-s-o-n-g songs, cheers, bonfire, and games.
and then lawmiewfong and chinee gave each and every one us a rubber tree seed. and when they presented it, they said somehitng special about each and everyone of us that ties witht the qualities of the rubber seed. quite cool right? but they got veyr exhaustive with their reasons very quickly. like i was the like the rubber tree seed, coz like rubber, i was super flexi -.-" lameness..

then we played soccer from midnight to 3am! lol. super tiring.

DAY 4
nothing to say tbou this day lah. going home liao. packed up all our stuff. said goodbyes and whatnots, and did last minute lame stuff. we took bus to some lameass shopping centre called IOI Mall. (pronouced eye-oh-eye mall) super dumb place. 'nuff said.
then went home. >.< tiredd.....

not going to put quotes. too many liao >.< so much lame shit.

ok thatsit. cant think of anything else to write about the LDP camp. it was just a'ight, nothing memorable like our previous OEPs, but not super crappy like most of the others. but pretty fun nonetheless. =)

okok. then on friday, went to bong's house to bake cake for roy's bdae. technically another girl's bdae too, but i dunno her. the cake was damn fun to bake. should try it myself one day.

anyway. all the taiwan peeps were there. and i only knew the ac guys, so it was damn awkward. felt damn extra being the odd one out. quite hard to make conversation too when everyone knows each other, and you dun even know their names.. >.<
but nevermind. toh wanted me to come...

well.. HAPPY BDAE AGAIN, TOH!

the people were quite nice. but still damn weirdish for me... -.- watched elektra, ate dinner and ran off early.. heehee.. toh got 2 hamsters from the girls as a present.. lol.

fingers too tired liao. this is my longest post yet, not counting lyrics.. whee.

miracle drug

2005-01-16T22:16:00.000+08:00

ahhh.. U2...

ok letsee. these past few days have been pretty hectic. busy with my own little stuff. but really nothing interesting to blog about.

anyway. next 4 days, i'll be at kluang for leadership development camp, supposedly to help us develop into leaders. -.-' its organised by tim lim (woohoo.) and we're gonna be split up into tribes and do lame stuff, and the teachers are gonna grade us on leadership potential. my sides are cracking up with laughter already.

if not for the pathetic reason they came up with this camp, i think it'll be alright. unless i get bitten by a snake or something. oh well *shrugs*.

just fnishe dpacking my bags. there is an incessant nagging feeling in my head, prompting me that there is somehting incredibly important that i forgot to pack in. but i cant for my life figure out what.

ill find out tomorrow... >.<

see ya guys.

Miracle Drug - U2
I want to trip inside your head
Spend the day there...
To hear the things you haven't said
And see what you might see

I want to hear you when you call
Do you feel anything at all?
I want to see your thoughts take shape
And walk right out
Freedom has a scent
Like the top of a new born baby's head

The songs are in your eyes
I see them when you smile
I've had enough I'm not giving up
On a miracle drug

Of science and the human heart
There is no limit
There is no failure here sweetheart
Just when you quit...

I am you and you are mine
Love makes nonsense of space
And time...will disappear
Love and logic keep us clear
Reason is on our side, love...

The songs are in your eyes
I see them when you smile
I've had enough of romantic love
I'd give it up, yeah, I'd give it up
For a miracle, a miracle drug, a miracle drug

God I need your help tonight

Beneath the noise
Below the din
I hear a voice
It's whispering
In science and in medicine
"I was a stranger
You took me in"

The songs are in your eyes
I see them when you smile
I've had enough of romantic love
I'd give it up, yeah, I'd give it up
For a miracle, miracle drug

Miracle, miracle drug

i'm still here

2005-01-12T20:51:00.000+08:00

sigh ok where to begin.

er. school has been fine. these few days were a bit boring, especially maths. chan win hon's classes are exceptionally inviting for us to sleep in. and we STILL get tim lim this year for IHS. !^@&*#^@&*#$!!

otherwise, most other subjects are ok.

just read nehnehnail's blogs, and i was thinking about some of the same stuff as he did: about priorites. for those who dun know, nehnehnail has 3 ccas.

i dun have 3 ccas, but im worried anyway about this year and my many commitments. firstly, my largest commitment lies in academics. i really need to do well this year, since i know now what to expect for certain subjects already. i know i can do much better.

another large commitment is choir. no doubt its a werid cca to spend so much time on. but for some reason, i feel so tied towards it. the memories. the friends. sigh. SYF this year, and we're gonna try our best. then FOA. then perhaps the senior's dinner... ='( gotta give it all for choir.

and then there's NCC. ok. so i ponned it half the time in the last 3 years. but i dun really feel like being so irresponsible this year. ahhh. shoot me.

there's OM too. we failed horrible 2 years ago. i remember that at that year of 2003, right outside the GE resource room, we made a pact... that we would NEVER do OM ever again in our entire lives. according to wesley, we'd rather turn gay. and we are doing it again, much to the surprise of even ourselves. we *want* to win, and im going to give OM my all too.

and my friends too. my friends mean absolutely everything to me. without them, ill be really really lost. thanx to roy, bong, wes, song, mark, mun, olly, jason, the ians and deecky; the people i hang around the most in sec4gep. and the choir d00ds: jerome, coll, kenneth, ivan, chris, lanerd etc. vicsiek, shiao are also really great friends. =)
basically, everybody i know is sort of a friend to me. as long as i havent explicitly said very vulgar words to your face, im sure we're friends.. lol.. friends to me also come in no.1

not only those, ive got my other pursuits. like my non-existent fitness (which is about to change). learning of guitar. relationship with parents.

and my walk with Christ. im nearly a year old liao. the first year was amazing. and now, i just wanna walk closer with Him. God will always come in first for priorities. =)

i want to give my all to everything, but im afraid with so many things, i have less to offer to each of my commitments. is it wrong to want to do everything? can i do it? so many questions plagueing my mind.

but i *do* know that i will emerge fine. am praying to find the right balance in my life, and to make the right choices....

anyway, in advance, i just want to say sorry if i am ever needed, and i'm not there. =(

ok. for a useless bit of information that makes no diff whether you know or not.. my leyden jar works!! yay!

ok. im super tired. i took longer than expecetd to type this out. i was doing so many other stuff at the same time.. =)

I'm Still Here - John Rzeznik
Not an answer to the Earth
On a moment
That's held in your arms
And what do you think you'd ever say
I won't listen anyway
You don't know me
And I'll never be who you want me to be

And what do you think you'd understand
I'm a boy, no, I'm a man
You can't take me
And throw me away
And how can you learn what's never shown
Yeah you stand here on you own
They don't know me
'Cause I'm not here

Chorus:
And I want a moment to be real
Want to touch things I don't feel
Want to hold on
And feel I belong
And how can the world want me to change
They're the ones that stay the same
They don't know me
'Cause I'm not here

And you see the things they never see
All you wanted I could be
Now you know me
And I'm not afraid
And I want to tell you who I am
Can you help me be a man
They can't break me
As long as I know who I am

[Chorus]

They can't tell me who to be
'Cause I'm not what they see
Yeah the world is still sleeping while I keep on dreaming for me
And their words are just whispers and lies that I'll never believe

[Chorus]

I'm the one
'Cause I'm still here
I'm still here
I'm still here
I'm still here

hold on

2005-01-09T20:37:00.000+08:00

sigh. ok. i think im a total psychopath. i have like really serious problems. i read about all these kinds of emotional or mental problems in the internet, and every single descriptions fits me rather perfectly. like, OCD or apergers or autism or split-personality or whatnot. and if its true that im insane, i probably cant tell that i am, can i? IT ALL MAKES SENSE!!!

ok. now im just blabbering.

anyway. thx to the people who tagged. haha.

err letsee. yesterday was dumb. woke up at like, 6 to go to school. met there, and then went to kallang sea traning centre for prof test. it was incredibly dumb. like we spent 10 minutes doing some theory paper. which was quite ok lah. some questions were just damn DUH-like, while some were quite tricky. i think the person who set the paper this time actually graduated from school, instead of some mat in the NCC hq who failed kindergarten and dropped out.. then, went to orchard with marky to eat lunch. spent the last of my money. am broke now. ouch.

then read stupid books at borders. called jason, and then hugn around orchard for quite a while. didnt really do much. jason just spent most of his time buying stuff he needed.

then went for church, which was pretty good. lol..

then woke up early today. did a bit or work, then went for post-e. was good as well.
then went to mun's house for geog project. was ok lah. finished very fast, and instead spent most of our time slacking and doing wuliao stuff. like looking at mun's chat logs and pictures of taiwan. mun is a liar! he is sooo not overy her yet. forever talking about stuff, and somehow or rather having the conversation steer back to her again. and he refuses to throw away the present he got her for christmas. wouldnt even tear up his card. but me and roy ddi it for him.

sigh. then they started looking at taiwan piccys. i would be lying if i didnt say i was jealous. til today, i still wished i had gone, and not stayed behind for soemthing which i thought at that time was incredibly important. pfffft. i am crazy i tell you. sigh.

then when i went home, somehting incredibly surreal happened. i was crossing the overhead bridge outside KAP, when all of a sudden, i saw yijun and chunky! with some of their friends, though a few looked familiar and a few not at all. i was looking at the floor and didnt see. until they were like a metre away form me. then just surrounded me and started doing some cheer which they probably picked up at their new JC. and i was like... what? after that, i was like "ok... hello to you too.." damn funny.
then i walked down from the overhead bridge, recovering from the crazy ambush i just recieved. and then i heard someone call my name. i turned aorund to face the woman i had just walked past, and found out it was chinee! wahlau. so coincidental. so we just made a bit of small talk.. if i hadnt been so "whoa" i would have said somehting mroe intelligent.. other than "huh? oh hi. hello."

lol nvm.. ok. i better do a bit of work.. and stop thinking about so much stuff. i am crazy i tell yoU!!

Hold On - Jet
You tried so hard to be someone
That you forgot who you are
You tried to fill some emptiness
‘Til all you had spilled over
Now everything’s so far away
That you don’t know where you are, you are

[Chorus:]
When all that you wanted
And all that you had
Don’t seem so much
For you to hold on to [2x]
For you to belong to

When it’s hard to be yourself
It’s not to be someone else
Still everything’s so far away
That you forget where you are, you are

[Chorus:]
When all that you wanted
And all that you had
Don’t seem so much
For you to hold on to [2x]

Hold on [8x]

[Chorus:]
When all that you wanted
And all that you had
Don’t seem so much
For you to hold on to [3x]
For you to belong to

popular mechanics for broken hearts

2005-01-08T01:27:00.000+08:00

hi everyone! hi collin! how'd you find my blog? thought i hid it well enough =P
and shush. you're not allowed to tell anyone. lol..

thanx song, for sending this song! haha, that sounds funny...

argh!! tomorrow got NCC prof test. missed the one in dec, coz went overseas. wah.. luckily i got go for ncc today. moghan das is a crazy man. he's giving 1 demerit point to anybody who pons training even once. and hes dead serious. like we saw him filling it out in front of us.

i think i shall make a point to turn up for ncc as much as possible... not because of demerits lah.. but i think i just should. -.-
lack or any reason. i shall just pin it on moral obligation? man, ive grown soft..

anyway. ncc was dumb today. as usual. (hey, im going to show up for ncc, but that doesnt mean i wont change my perception of it) kevin koh quit, and liang chew man went up for year directorship, so the head of NCC now is moghan das..
and hes damn trigger-happy with demerit points.

anyway. im just gonna stick with NCC for this year only. then graduate from it with the o level bunch. i told that im definitely not going to stay next year, and hes pretty cool with it.. so lol..

anyway. got prof test tomorrow. uniform and what not ready liao.. cept for my boots. cant find it! will find it tomorrow morning, coz its so late and my parents are sleeping liao.

yay! ipod transfer complete! just finished transferring my entire library from com to laptop, and from laptop to pod.. =P

im the most bloody boliao person ever.

Popular Mechanics for Lovers - Beulah
I know he knocks you off your feet
You’re so bitter; you think he’s sweet
Well he’s wrong for you, I swear

Did you forget to read the script?
There was never a role for him
It was always you and me, just me

Popular mechanics for broken hearts could help me now

I know you never felt romance
And we always lack suspense
I can edit those parts out

I never made you feel complete
I would fall beneath your feet
I would never bring you down, so down

Popular mechanics for broken hearts could help me now

Just because he loves you too
He would never take a bullet for you
Don’t believe a word he says
He would never cut his heart out for you

I heard he wrote you a song
But so what
Some guy wrote 69
And one just ain’t enough

And there’s so sense in trying
I know cuz I’ve been
Trying all the time to find something that would make you mine
But all I ever find my love
Are clichés that don’t rhyme

Popular mechanics for broken hearts could help me now

Just because he loves you too
He would never take a bullet for you
Don’t believe a word he says
He would never cut his heart out for you

everywhere

2005-01-06T20:56:00.000+08:00

err ok.
im going to make this an extra long post. coz i feel like it.

where shall i start? hmm. these few days have been ok. pretty fun moments, like how we mixed up chan win hon by telling him we are different people. i am matthew, matthew is clement, royston is johnseah, jonseah is royston, bensoh is jermgoh, jeremgoh is bensoh. so on and so forth =P *shh* he hasnt found out about it yet... lol..

but there are the pretty dull moments. like half falling asleep during certain periods. those few minutes in the day that you just wished you brought earmuffs and a pillow. >.<

yesterday, they told us that we had to shadow people for our ISO. pretty cool hor? i wanted to do something musically or artistically inclined. like erm. musician? web designer? somehting cool like that. but then couldnt find anyone to work with. so i just joined song and marky. they were intending to shadow chef chan! lol.. cool hor? in the end though, i "jumped ship" to royston and mun. feel so bad. sorry, song and marky! =)
we are going to shadow a DJ!! now doesnt that sound very cool? haha.

and we also had OM meeting yesterday.. yes yes yes! we have clarification! my heart is dancing with joy. and im sure dharma's talk with us has quelched colin's and kevin's desire to turn our 8 minute play into an intellectual debate. heehee. our OM looks more and mroe promising now. i think we have a standing chance in going to US!
and i wanna go US. we get to go disneyland this year. ive never been there before! its better if i go there now when im 15, than when im much older =P

also. today was pretty ok. had choir orientation. they used my flash presentation after all, so i was ranting in the last post about nothing. so it was more like a powerpoint on crack, but so what? i didnt want hours of working on it to go to waste...
then the choir performed to the sec1s. small repertoire, some from perth (which we miraculously remembered), some from carolling. plus, the sec4s did our very FUN-KEE vocal ensemble of So Happy Together. which we only took less than an hour to put everything together, like teaching notes to those who have not learnt it. for once, i think the sec4s are coming together very nicely. =) and we rocked! wheeeeee.
we didnt get much sec1s, which was a bit depressing. but we'll pray for the best =) and we didnt screw up our performance at all.

hmm. this year will be one of my most busiest years. even more busy than sec1.. in sec1, i had: 3 ccas, a third lang and godspell. which was crazy. (heehee. i bet noone knows my 3rd cca. i let you all guess.. =P )
this year, i have SYF comeptition, festival of arts (where the choir gets our own night), OM, and the regular IB workload. ouch. but nevermind! God will see me through.. and will bring bountiful harvests!

well, with so much stuff to do very soon, i doubt i will have time to blog so often... =( but i doubt many people read this blog anyway. i always get the feeling that what i write here is just a small fragment of the giant world wide web, and noone really gives a damn.. please tag lah! tag lah!

haha i sound so despotic. okok. gotta go now. this post isnt really as long as i'd like it to be...
hmm. have i left out anything? dun think so.. aiyah. ill find out sooner or later, like before i fall asleep or something =P

Everywhere - Michelle Branch
Turn it inside out so I can see
The part of you that's drifting over me
And when I wake you're never there
But when I sleep you're everywhere
You're everywhere

Just tell me how I got this far
Just tell me why you're here and who you are
'Cause every time I look
you're never there
And every time I sleep
you're always there

'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I close my eyes it's you I see
You're everything I know
that makes me believe
I'm not alone
I'm not alone

I recognize the way you make me feel
It's hard to think that
you might not be real
I sense it now, the water's getting deep
I try to wash the pain away from me
Away from me

'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I close my eyes it's you I see
You're everything I know
that makes me believe
I'm not alone
I'm not alone

I am not alone
Whoa, oh, oooh, oh

And when I touch your hand
It's then I understand
The beauty that's within
It's now that we begin
You always light my way
I hope there never comes a day
No matter where I go
I always feel you so

'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I close my eyes it's you I see
You're everything I know
that makes me believe
I'm not alone
'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I catch my breath
it's you I breathe
You're everything I know
that makes me believe
I'm not alone

You're in everyone I see
So tell me
Do you see me?

mm. love this song. yellowcard did a cover for this song too, which gives it a really cool "rock-ish" edge. and isnt the feeling of being unnoticed all too familiar?

ladeedaa..

one last breath

2005-01-04T19:46:00.000+08:00

only got home like an hour ago.. wahlau.

they tell me today that CCA presentation will not be done individualy by choir. instead, leeyensee or whatever is going to address all the musical ccas as a whole. under 15 minutes.

which will prob go something along the lines of:

"oh hello everybody! ACS has many musical ccas, such as the choir, the guitar ensemble and the symphonic band. and of course the chamber orchestra!!

*insert blah crap about chamber*

and if you don't want to join our super elite and incredibly powerful chamber, you can opt to join the lower ccas like choir or seomthing. *snicker*"

and coz of that, i did the stupid choir orientaion flash for nothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hate her....

anyways.... other than that, day was actually pretty fine. teachers were ok too. win hon loves permutations of the same equation, mervyln is as dramatic as ever, maria naaaathan is sick, sandra sim pwnz yvonne lim hands down and timlim can be "a serious person when he is very very serious".

did you see him on tv mobile? "i <3 teddybears! and im soooo not gay by the way.."
lol..

anyway. i gotta finish my chinese ASAP. i lied to her about why i didnt do it (i feel so bad now).... sigh. i would have done my chinese if i hadnt spent hours doing the orientation flash. of course, it doesnt really matter now, right?? argh.

oh well.. chinese beckons. >.<

one last breath - creed
Please come now I think I'm falling
I'm holding to all I think is safe
It seems I found the road to nowhere
And I'm trying to escape
I yelled back when I heard thunder
But I'm down to one last breath
And with it let me say
Let me say

Hold me now
I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking
That maybe six feet
Ain't so far down

I'm looking down now that it's over
Reflecting on all of my mistakes
I thought I found the road to somewhere
Somewhere in His grace
I cried out heaven save me
But I'm down to one last breath
And with it let me say
Let me say

Hold me now
I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking
That maybe six feet
Ain't so far down

Sad eyes follow me
But I still believe there's somthing left for me
So please come stay with me
'Cause I still believe there's something left for you and me
For you and me
For you and me

Hold me now
I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking

and i do not have a vendetta against chamber. oh noooo. in fact, olly's in chamber =)

all day

2005-01-03T18:20:00.000+08:00

cynic: err. ok... that was way too much information... care to leave your name? no wait.. i dun really want to know your name.. lol.. eww

sigh. anyway. quite pissed now. my mum just pounced on me while i was in the middle of this entry. she's like, damn paranoid that i may do something really weird on the com. of course i closed the blogger window lah. but she got damn pissed, and thought i was playing games or something..

come to think of it, i'd rather she think that i was "playing games", and not "something".

menopause. its a warning to everybody out there...

ok. other than that, today was great. first days are always fun. without the awkward new class thing of course, coz we get the exact same people, save for jed =(
err. i guess the highlight for the day is... long pants!!

"long pants make me look manly!!" - Ian Lin

haha... seriously lah. they look so funky. feel so sec4-ish.. =P i can feel the lower sec tremble in fear! muahaha.
no new teachers that teach us, except for Chan Win Hon. wahlau. funny guy man. talks very enthusiastically about his favourite hobby. hahaha... =P

well. good start to new year. this is going to be fun.

i think to prove my mum wrong, i shall go offline and start doing chinese...

meet you there

2005-01-01T20:46:00.000+08:00

came back from church retreat. very fun, and very invigorating. the message preached though was pretty serious. made me think about alot of stuff, and about the future...

well, at this point, i guess i should wish everybody a happy new year =)

but from the way thigns are going, i dun think 2005 will be a happy one at all. so many people killed from the tsunami and all.. quite depressing. its a rocky start for the new year, thats for sure. and i think 2005 will be an extremely tough year for me..
its 2 days to school reopening, and the first thing that hits me about the new year, is that i'll be walking back to school as a sec4. yup, a senior.. i mean, you can kinda screw around in sec1 and 2, prob sec3 as well.. but as a sec4, you have to be responsible as a senior right?
i do respect alot of my seniors, especially from choir. and kinda made me think... as a senior, am i a least bit of a role model to juniors? not a bit really. i think im not a good senior at all.

oh man. i am such a kill-joy.

well, i think what im trying to say, is that as the new year arrives, am i prepared and ready for what lies ahead? can i handle all that i want to? or juggle and prioritise responsiblities?
all i answer is that its going to be a challenging year ahead. one full of many trials and obstacles. but im sure i can overcome all of them, and emerge a better person. i mean, what doesnt kill you, makes you stronger, right? haha..

i wrote my resolutions some posts back already, and i dun wan to repeat them. but basically in this new year, i want to grow. in all aspects.
academically, physically, and definitely spiritually...
well, heres to the new year, and the unknowns that lie ahead.. =)
2005 will be a year of many trials, but will also be a year of victories!

yam-seng!

ok. enough seriousy stuff.

im going to enjoy the last amount of freedom i have. before i start chinese homework!!! ah!!!!
nvm. can finish one.. nothing is impossible.

and looky! i can see my fingernails! im so happy. i stopped biting my nails for how long already. feels so good kicking a bad habit.. haha. i make it sound like its some kind of bad drug addiction... but i kicked it! whooo...

this is a nice simple plan song.. from their first album.. well, this song is to all friends. pretty appropriate for the new year... for friends out there, current or past. these past few days, catching up with old friends whom i fell out with due to the passing of time has been a great time =)

damn i feel so cheesey. haha.. but new year's day happens only once a year, so i guess im forgiven.. heehee..

Meet You There - Simple Plan
Now you're gone,
I wonder why
You left me here,
I think about it on, and on,
and on, and on, and on, again.
I know you're never coming back,
I hope that you can hear me,
I'm waiting to hear from you..

Until i do,
You're gone away,
I'm left alone,
A part of me is gone,
And I'm not moving on,
So wait for me,
I know the day will come..

[chorus]
I'll meet you there,
No matter where life takes me to,
I'll meet you there,
And even if I need you here,
I'll meet you there.

I wish I could have told you,
The things I kept inside,
But now I guess its just too late.
So many things remind me of you,
I hope that you can hear me,
I miss you,
This is goodbye,
One last time..

You're gone away,
I'm left alone,
A part of me is gone,
And I'm not moving on,
So wait for me,
I know the day will come..

[chorus]

I'll meet you there....

And where I go you'll be there with me,
Forever you'll be right here with me..

[chorus]

I'll meet you there...
I'll meet you there..

anything but ordinary

2004-12-30T15:34:00.000+08:00

argh crap. what have i done? finally got my head out a mess, and could finally breathe, only to plunge myself head-first into trouble yet again..
sigh.. ticking timebomb...

bleargh. finally! finished the choir orientation presentation. tried my best. i think it looks a little on the fugly side.. but i dun wanna change everything all over again. oh nooo.
now im trying to finish chinese.. damn. im so dumb lah. whole holiday dun wan to finish.. must wait until now then start.

i have noone but myself to blame, and im punished in the form of staying at home doing homework. =P

Anything But Ordinary - Avril Lavigne
Sometimes I get so weird
I even freak myself out
I laugh myself to sleep it's my lullaby
Sometimes I drive so fast
Just to feel the danger
I want to scream it makes me feel alive

[chorus]
Is it enough to love
Is it enough to breathe
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

To walk within the lines
Would make my life so boring
I want to know that I have been
To the extreme
So knock me off my feet
Come on now give it to me
Anything to make me feel alive

[chorus]

Let down your defenses
Use no common sense
If you look you will see
That this world is a beautiful, accident,
turbulent, succulent, opulent,
permanent, no way
I wanna taste it
Don't wanna waste it away

Sometimes I get so weird
I even freak my self out
I laugh myself to sleep it's my lullaby

[chorus x2]

nice song from avril lavigne's first album. much better than that crappy sk8erboi.

sigh. come to think of it, i dunno why im blogging also. like got nothing to blog about hor. whatever. this is just a heads-up then...

bleargh.

sometimes you can't make it on your own

2004-12-26T16:53:00.000+08:00

... you need the people around you =)

am really grateful for all my friends and family. thank God for the people surrounding me in my life. the people who care and let me know im loved.. i am truly blessed.. =)

lets see. err christmas eve went to my aunts house for christmas dinner. hung around for awhile.. it was pretty boring coz there was noone there my age. and i found out that my mum's best friend's husband's sister is from fcbc too.. o.0 now thats weird.. so she's like my aunt-in-law? i dunno..

then on christmas, spent time with family. went for brunch, at a dim sum place (woke up really late haha)... i dun really eat dim sum often, so i dun really know most of the stuff they put on the table.. then i saw this plate of funny pastry and asked my mum what it was, and she said it was tau sar piah!. i had never seen a tausarpiah before, so i was eating it and laughing damn loudly at the same time... kept reminding me of henry.. spasticated. my parents thought i was crazy. i had to explain to my sis all about henry and beer and tausarpiahs.. i even sang the tausarpiah song and nearly got her choking on the dimsum.. damn funny.

err then. walked around orchard. then decided to be a total ass and buy angels and demons from borders. what a more interesting date to read it than christmas? lol..

then met church cell group at dhoby gaut... went fort canning for xmas celebration! so cool. very crowded and quite fun. we all got this gift pack, and we started playing around witht he balloons and stuff. me and timlim managed to blow a balloon in a balloon. not as easy as it looks, ok. we also got this blinking tube of light, which was *erherm* rather phallic looking. yaoqun managed to blow up a balloon with the tube of light inside... hahah. funky.
also played around with the cans of fake snow. quite fun lah. reached home to find out that the snow had stained my white shirt slightly yellowish. boo. think its washable though.

anwyay. worship and service was quite good. indeed. christmas isnt christmas till it happens in your heart. ladumdum. cant get that stupid song outta my head. think it was the nicest song in our carolling repertoire... hmm..

gah. sis wants to use com.. i think i'll change my links tomorroe. very old never change liao. heehee. so dun worry. will link all the people soon.

Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own - U2
Tough, you think you've got the stuff
You're telling me and anyone
You're hard enough

You don't have to put up a fight
You don't have to always be right
Let me take some of the punches
For you tonight

Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don't have to go it alone
And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you when I don't pick up the phone
Sometimes you can't make it on your own

We fight all the time
You and I... that's alright
We're the same soul
I don't need... I don't need to hear you say
That if we weren't so alike
You'd like me a whole lot more

Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don't have to go it alone
And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you when I don't pick up the phone
Sometimes you can't make it on your own

I know that we don't talk
I'm sick of it all
Can - you - hear - me - when - I
Sing, you're the reason I sing
You're the reason why the opera is in me...

Where are we now?
I've got to let you know
A house still doesn't make a home
Don't leave me here alone...

And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you that makes it hard to let go
Sometimes you can't make it on your own
Sometimes you can't make it
The best you can do is to fake it
Sometimes you can't make it on your own

when it's over

2004-12-24T17:47:00.000+08:00

bleargh. i'm so tired now...

let's start of by saying.. its CHRISTMAS EVE! woohoo!

oh well. bought my christmas presents already. only buying for family. im too broke to buy for anyone else... ack.

anyway. i went to make my IC yesterday. usually i hate taking pictures, coz i always look ugly in them. like i'l be blinking when the camera goes off, or i'll have a stupid grin of something... haha. anyway. i was kinda nervous coz the photo was gonna stick with me for prob the rest of my life. but to my relief it turned out good! like, better than usual! yay...

then from lavender (where i made my ic), i headed to orchard to get some presents. i got my sister the mean girl's vcd (which i happen to know that she loves the movie coz i secretly visit her blog... muahaha), my mum some stuff from the body shop, and a HUGE mug for my dad.

i wish i had more cash. then i could have bought more stuff for friends..

then i went to bong's house to watch scary movie! both 1 and 2.. it was damn farneee. like dumbass humour and sick jokes all over the damn place. then we kinda mucked around orchard talking and helping him choose a present. then we also played lan for around 2 hours... (gah. am i the only one who still plays lan? everyone else has b.net liao. boo.)

then today, wokeup late. then went to orchard to watch kungfu hustle... with shivana, mikey, timlim, chanleong and bong. whoa. mikey looks abit diff... haha.
kungfu hustle was damn lame and out of point.. was sitting next to some weirdo guy who didnt pay for his ticket and sneaked in. so when the lady with the real ticket came in, there was some really ugly brawl that happened. quite amusing. ugly singaporeans.. tsk tsk.

anyway... i love christmas. except for the fact that it's steeped in commercialism and you cant walk 100m in orchard road without somebody ambushing you and asking you to donate to help the poor/oprhans/disabled/oldfolks/abandoned pets... or that you're expected to buy gifts for so many people. or that at christmas parties lots of people get drunk and i can't! (juz kidding on the last one)

but christmas is really fun. just spending time with the people you love.. =)

it's a bit early for resolutions but i'm gonna but them down anyway.. haha..

1) stop biting my fingernails! (ok, this one is considered half done. coz ive already gone by 2 weeks without doing it! even during choir time b4 performance, which is usually very stressful...)
2) learn guitar properly! like really properly..
3) finally get headphones for my ipod
4) to top a subject. i dunno which one or how. i just wanna top a subject.
5) to make choir exco 2005 successful
6) for OM 2005 to totally rock!
7) to definitely watch my back. and not get backstabbed. again.
8) to catch with old friends =)
9) and not fall out with my current ones =(
10) to make 2005 a blast!

whee. i'd better get ready for christmas dinner...

which reminds me.. im totally sorry shiao, that i cant accompany you... =( boo..

When It's Over - Sugar Ray
When it's over
That's the time I fall in love again
And when it's over
That's the time you're in my heart again
And when you go go go go
I know
And it never ends
It never ends

[chorus]
All the things that I used to say
All the words that got in the way
All the things that I used to know
Have gone out the window
All the things that she used to bring
All the songs she used to sing
All the favorite TV shows
Have gone out the window

I'm missing you
I never knew how much she'd loved me
I'm missing you
I never knew how much you meant to me
I need you and when you go go go go
I know
It never ends
Never ends

[chorus]

I'm wishing you
You never said you were pretending
I'm wishing you
You feel the same and just come back to me
I need you and when you go go go go
I know
It never ends
It never ends
When it's over
Can I still come over
And when it's over
Is it really over
When it's over
That's the time I fall in love again

[chorus]

hear you me

2004-12-21T01:38:00.000+08:00

ka blah.

performed today. dman horrible. to all those people who said "it was ok lah", you liars!
i blame the mikes. yea it was the mikes.
oh well. this is the only performance we were actually on pitch all the way through. our volume was much to be desired though..

stupid mikes...

anyway. lets forget the performance.. haha... after final rehearsal, me, bong, wes and jerome went to coro for lan.. then after that went to jerome's house. lol his brother is damn funny. not to mention i have utter respect for anyone who can keep welsey absolutely shut. welsey was owned!

after performance, bong left with the guys from taiwan and the rest of his fan club =P
then we all went cine to watch movie. but it was the premier of kungfu hustle so it was totally packed. so bad. and cine doesnt even shaw ocean's twelve -.-'

so we wandered around for a while, finding a newspaper to see the movie timeslots. so most of the sec3s (me, wes, jerome, kenneth, coll), we were at the 3rd level, and we saw tucky.. he was at the first level going to basement. and then we leaned over the railing and just shouted "TUCK LEONG!!" damn loudly..
like everybody from top to bottom heard it lah. even those people from pastamania heard, and were staring at us... hahahaa... so we just ran off.. dunno if tucky heard us or not...

then we managed to sneak in to cheers, which was cordoned off for the premier, by sneaking past the security. so we bought straits times and checked it.. and, wow! lido does in fact have ocean's 12, showing at 8.45! oh dear. its 8.30 now.. what do we do?
hahaha.. we ran from cine all the way to shaw in under 5 minutes... damn pro lah. 11 people sprinting around orchard weaving through people with baby trolleys and all.. damn weird looking.
and then we reached there and found out 8.45 was sold out, but there was a 9.30 one.. we all went for it anyway.. lol..

ocean's 12 is a pretty good movie... but its not as good at 11, coz 11 actually had a real heist.. 12 had no action in the form of complicated stunts and heists, but just lots of twists and stuff. and the plot is almost non-exsitent.. plus, the ending is so deus ex...
the only good thing is its intelligent humour. and that there is so many twists you really have to think and remember all the stupid hints all over the place. clever movie. and nice cinematography.

poo. im rambling arent i? i think i'd better sleep now. so tireed..

Jimmy Eat World - Hear You Me
There's no-one in town I know
You gave us some place to go
I never said thankyou for that
I thought I might get one more chance
What would you think of me now?
So lucky, so strong, so proud
I never said thankyou for that
Now I'll never have a chance

May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friends
On sleepless roads the sleepless go
May angels lead you in

So what would you think of me now?
So lucky, so strong, so proud
I never said thankyou for that
Now I'll never have a chance

May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friends
On sleepless roads the sleepless go
May angels lead you in

May angels lead you in
May angels lead you in...

And if you were with me tonight
I'd sing to you just one more time
A song for a heart so big
God wouldn't let it live

May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friends
On sleepless roads the sleepless go
May angels lead you in

argh. just realised this is the second jimmy eat world song ive used as title. i guess it doesnt really count. this isnt the jimmy eat world sound at all. was kinda surprised they were the ones who sang it when i first heard it... haha..

bleargh. bye.

wherever you will go...

2004-12-19T22:17:00.000+08:00

wahlau damn tired.

went for post-e early morning. got lost... arrived there 1 hour early, but spent 45 minutes finding the stupid place from the bus stop. walked 1 huge circle around bencoolen and waterloo street, and even almost landed near chinatown there...
luckily found it.

then spent 1 hour at PS looking at books. read almost half of "michael moore is a stupid white man".. interesting book. lol...

and dunno why today keep meeting people out of nowhere. like how i met a friend waiting for the same train at dhoby gaut. and fish at the bus stop at newton..
haha... then met up with wesley, collin and jerome at balmoral for lunch. blah.

then went to stuarts house for tenor/bass gathering thing. rehearsed for awhile, and also slacked alot. stuart is like, damn rich lah. his family owns like 5 cars, and the house is huge. and he has this giant screen flatscreen tv in his room with xbox. wireless controls, surround sound and everything >.<

then went to coro watched wesley and jerome play lan for awhile. wesley's brothers were there also.. but i dun think his brothers remember me much, coz they didnt mutilate me when they saw me.

then had pri school reunion. its not really the first time we've organised one, but its prob one of the first major ones ive gone to in a long time. i basically gave up on them after sec 1.
after today, im kinda reminded why.. =S

it was damn boring lah. seriously. darren was the only one who came from AC. and no offence, but he was totally flirting with all the girls. lol.. and so i was kinda a drifter, moving here and there are mingling round. there were the guys whose conversation revolved around nintendo and gundam, the weird pyromaniacs who set fire to almost everything and anything (the dude actually brought a real blowtorch) and the people who went around playing with cards..
stupid geps.. =P
other than just eating a bit, there wasnt much else going on. quite sad really. and most of them sutck to their own schools and such, so there wasnt much interesting stuff for me..

i am never going for reunions ever again.

listened to this song on the way home. this is no doubt. my fav song of all time. =)

Wherever You Will Go - The Calling
So lately, been wondering,
Who will be there to take my place
When I'm gone, you'll need love
To light the shadows on your face
If a great wave shall fall
It would fall upon us all
and between the sand and stone
Could you make it on your own

Chorus:
If I could, then I would
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high, or down low
I'll go wherever you will go

And maybe, I'll find out
The way to make it back someday
To watch you, to guide you
Through the darkest of your days
If a great wave shall fall
It would fall upon us all
Well then I hope there's someone out there
Who can bring me back to you

Chorus

Runaway with my heart
Runaway with my hope
Runaway with my love

I know now, just quite how
My life and love might still go on
In your heart, in your mind
I'll stay with you for all of time

Chorus

If I could turn back time
I'll go wherever you will go
If I could make you mine
I'll go wherever you will go
I'll go wherever you will go

remember! choir preforming tomorrow at paragon!! 7 - 7.30!!

come see if you can, but i warn you, it wont be very good... judging from our last rehearsal, we're gonna be really bad..
but we still have a bit of time tomorrow morning, so the choir will pull off another miracle yet again! =)

above thy deep and dreamless sleep..

2004-12-18T21:47:00.000+08:00

yay! i was baptised today!

=)

and wesley even surprised me by coming to watch... haha.. hes actually quite nice sometimes. just cant help shooting his mouth off whenever he can though..haha... =) thanx for coming..

being baptised was kinda cool though.. nearly forgot to answer the questions and was preparing to submerge already. luckily they stopped me.. haha =P

gah. tomorrow morning have post-e, then afternoon have to rush for tenor-bass unofficial sectionals at stuart's house, then at night somemore still got the NHPS gep reunion. -.-' so tiring. just looking at what i have to do tomorrow and it makes me feel like skipping one of them.

but im not going to.. ack. im too nice, lol... jkjk

cant get this song out of my head. lol.. we were originally supposed to do it for carolling, but because we werent comfortable with the song enough to perform, we scrapped this song in the end. ack.. memorising the tenor countermelody for nothing...

O little town of Bethlehem
How still we see thee lie
Above thy deep and dreamless sleep
The silent stars go by
Yet in thy dark streets shineth
The everlasting Light
The hopes and fears of all the years
Are met in thee tonight

For Christ is born of Mary
And gathered all above
While mortals sleep, the angels keep
Their watch of wondering love
O morning stars together
Proclaim the holy birth
And praises sing to God the King
And Peace to men on earth

How silently, how silently
The wondrous gift is given!
So God imparts to human hearts
The blessings of His heaven.
No ear may his His coming,
But in this world of sin,
Where meek souls will receive him still,
The dear Christ enters in.

O holy Child of Bethlehem
Descend to us, we pray
Cast out our sin and enter in
Be born to us today
We hear the Christmas angels
The great glad tidings tell
O come to us, abide with us
Our Lord Emmanuel

every breath we drew was... hallelujah

2004-12-17T23:16:00.000+08:00

sigh.. long day today..

choir whole day from 9 to 5.. quite sian. we seriously sound like shit. those people who are coming to support on monday, i warn you. we are seriously lacking of people and we sound sloppy. argh.
and we have only 4 more hours to polish up our 10+ songs. we are so screwed. but miracles happen, so i'm praying.. lol..

then after choir, me and wesley went to qiao zhi's place for his birthday party. we took a 1 hour mrt ride from school, so we reached there like 6.30, when almost everybody started leaving... like out of 19 people, 11 left at the exact same moment we arrived... -.-'
damned choir.
so we had pretty much lotsa fun. wesley trashed me at table-tennis, while i trashed wesley at naruto on PS. =P but we missed the cake and the food coz we were so late. oh well, at least we arrived all the same, which was what qiaozhi wanted in the first place.. he prob won't be reading this, but Happy Birthday anyway!!

okok. i heared this song on tv "Hallelujah" by Jeff Buckley. i swear, it is one of the most beautiful songs i have ever heard. i nearly cried when i heard this version for the first time. its so sad...

Hallelujah - Jeff Buckley
I heard there was a secret chord
That David played and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you
Well it goes like this the fourth, the fifth
The minor fall and the major lift
The baffled King composing hallelujah

Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah

Well your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you to her kitchen chair
She broke your throne and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the hallelujah

Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah

Baby i've been here before
I've seen this room and i've walked this floor
I used to live alone before i knew you
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
But love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah

Well there was a time when you let me know
What's really going on below
But now you never show that to me do you
But remember when i moved in you
And the holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was hallelujah

Well, maybe there's a God above
But all i've ever learned from love
Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew you
It's not a cry that you hear at night
It's not somebody who's seen the light
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah

lyric-wise, this song is a masterpiece...
i knew there were biblical references when i first heard it, but i didnt knew there were so many! theres King David who composed the book of Psalms... and the second verse mentioning both him and Samson, who were 2 men in the Bible who surrendered to women and lost their closeness with God...
(correct me if im wrong?)
and in case you thought "Well it goes like this, the fourth, the fifth/The minor fall and the major lift" was a weird line, i checked the guitar chords for this song, and its a literal translation. the actual song IS an "F G Am F"..
the guy who wrote this song is a genius i tell you...

but im still quite confused whether this is a religious song or a non-religious one. i think it's open to intepretation. either way, this is a beautifully sung song. very poignant and bitter...

woot. ive talked enough crap about this song. but it's so... intriguing.

anyway. im getting baptised tomorrow!!!
its gonna feel damn weird though.. haha...

pity my parents prob wont be able to come. but nvm..

oh well. until next time...

high and dry

2004-12-14T18:20:00.000+08:00

choir again today. we are carolling on monday at paragon. come watch if you care, though most people who will be watching are really bored tourists or something. learning all kinds of songs in weird harmony and horrible horrible lines for tenor parts. we have to strain and all coz its so high.

and there were only 2 tenors for combined today. stupid wesley and kaiheng ran off halfway. i didnt want to go with them, coz i promised kenneth i wouldnt... poor president has to account for missing runaways..

and i must thank a friend.. when i was depressed, he didnt do anything but listen to me rant off, about stuff that had been bothering me for quite a long time. just listening to my continuous rant was more than i could have asked for. it made me feel so much better than saying "oh, it could have been worse" or "it'll turn out fine". sorry for making you listen to so much crap that was bothering me, and thx again.. =)

wahlau. finally told my mum i was getting baptised this saturday. cant believe i took so long to tell. i mean, i couldnt just go "hey mum! im getting baptised saturday. yea, this is great cauliflower...", ya know?
so i just told her, and she just "uh huh"... wahlau. worry about how my parents would react for nothing. feel so dumb.

nevermind. must learn most of the carols by today, so i can teach all the people who ponned choir tomorrow.

Radiohead - High And Dry
Two jumps in a week, I bet you think that's pretty clever don't you boy.
Flying on your motorcycle, watching all the ground beneath you drop.
You'd kill yourself for recognition; kill yourself to never ever stop.
You broke another mirror; you're turning into something you are not.

Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry
Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry

Drying up in conversation, you will be the one who cannot talk.
All your insides fall to pieces, you just sit there wishing you could still make love
They're the ones who'll hate you when you think you've got the world all sussed out
They're the ones who'll spit at you. You will be the one screaming out.

Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry
Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry

It's the best thing that you've ever had, the best thing that you've ever, ever had.
It's the best thing that you've ever had; the best thing you've had has gone away.

Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry
Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry

never let you go

2004-12-13T18:50:00.000+08:00

choir was stupid. damn boring. me, bong and wesley ponned it halfway during our lunch break.. haha... we lied and said we had OM.

so we went to plaza sing and ate. then played a bit of lan. royt also joined us halfway. haha...

wahlau. all the taiwan people won't stop talking about how good the trip was. =( knew i should have gone. stupid choir's fault. and i thought i had my priorities in order when i put choir first. and it turned out to be pretty shitty anyways.

lan was fun. havent spent time with old friends for a looong time. and muahah! i am no longer a CS n00b! i am now t3h 1337!1!

and royt thinks i dyed my hair! hahaha... crazy prefect instincts.

ohno. theres still choir tomorrow... damn.

Third Eye Blind - Never Let You Go
There's every good reason for letting you go
She's sneaky and smoked out
And it's starting to show
I never let you go
I never let you go
I never let you go

Chorus:
I never let you turn around, our back on each other
That's a good idea, break a promise to your mother
Turn around your back on each other

You say I've changed
Well maybe I did
But even if I changed
What's wrong with it?
I never let you go
I never let you go
I never let you go

If there's a reason, it's lost on me
Maybe we'll be friends,
I guess we'll see
I never let you go
I never let you go
I never let you go

happy birthday to me..

2004-12-12T19:15:00.000+08:00

yay!

thx to all people who wished me a happy birthday.. made my day it did. and the presents! wow.
and i finally got a frinkin dickin guitar! woo..

and to spoil my mood i haf to go choir tomorrow. shit. and see people i dun really wanna see.

whatever. yay!

nothin's ever gonna happen 'round here..

2004-12-10T09:41:00.000+08:00

ah. waking up to the dulcet tones of the neighbours upstairs drilling into their walls. >.<

crap. theres nothing to do.. i've tried almost everything but it's so dull. i've owned my sisters at X-men VS Street Fighter, Marvel VS Street Fighter and Marvel VS Capcom; i've finished Metal Slug 3 and Metal Slug X; and i've completed pokemon 4 times in a row.

so ive come to a conclusion i've either got to buy some really good games from now on, or go out and do something. like erm.. something.

but somehow everyone seems to have disappeared overseas... =(

and this blog isnt very exciting either. i need to spend my time doing somehting better. sigh.

The parents are sleeping soundly
The neighbors are dead as wood
I’m getting up and coming over
We gotta rock the neighborhood

Nothin’s ever gonna happen ‘round here
If we don’t make it happen
Sleep away the day if you want to
But I got something that I gotta do

a lack of colour

2004-12-07T22:03:00.000+08:00

just realised that my posts are getting more and more irregular, so i'm blogging now for the sake of blogging.. lol.. =P

also realised that my last few posts are also very depressing and serious-ey. we cant always write or read about depressingy stuff can we? so here goes a blog entry with nothing but serious-free stuff! just useless bits of information about my life that doesnt make a difference whether you know or not!

lol..

a friend recommended me MegaTokyo, a totally cool webcomic. its more narrative than a stand-alone strip panel, so you won't really understand any of it, unless you start from the very beginning. which i did. o.0
that's 644 strips ok. very painful for the eyes. but still very good.. other than the parts where largo does his whole psychotic-undead-rant, this webcomic is really good. bits of witty humour here and there and a very nice plot. =)
it's also drawn anime style, i must say its good, considering the artist isnt even jap.

and wow! the taiwan people will be coming back in 5 days. yay. they'd better still be speaking in english when they get back, or i will definitely freak.
speaking of 5 days from now. *cough cough*. 12th december. *cough cough*

haha. its my birthday! duh!
lol.. sorry cant help it..

and my parents are going to get me a guitar! they didnt even try to surprise me. sigh.. lol. at least now i can finally get down to actually learning how to play it.

so yay. cya all. im hungry.. food beckons..

runaway

2004-12-06T19:53:00.000+08:00

i like this song, but the only reason why i can't put the lyrics is coz i can't find it! not even on google...
it's sung by electrico, which is a local band. but even local bands can't be that obscure! i mean, it doesnt even have an official website! eeh.

haha. funny how we long for the holidays when there's school, but when it comes, we cant find anything to do. or maybe everybody has something to do, and im just special. =( yea that must be it..

anyways. going to some funny pri school reunion on the 19th. ok im a bit wary of it, coz everyime i hear there's a reunion, only about 10+ people arrive. that's why i gave up on all reunions after sec1. but this time its serious i guess, got yahoo group and everything.

am i weird? coz im not exactly happy to return to my pri school. i didnt hate it or anything, but its like returning after so long, and is so awkward. like im supposed to go there and all of a sudden recognize people and talk like we knew each other for ages. ack. for me, i havent been keeping contact with the rest of the people. dunno, usual case of drifting apart. and this reunion is awakening in me a sense of fear and dread.

why? i guess people change. have i changed since pri 6? duh. have other people? i would assume yes, too. will the people who were once friends still continue to be after many years? will we still be able to talk about stuff and laugh about them? its hard to figure out...

sigh. and in these past few days, the past has come to haunt me. in more ways than one, though some more welcome than others. resurfaces many issues ive been avoiding for quite some time...

if anyone from my pri school stumbles upon my blog and reads this post, i am so going to delete this.. actually, i wont. but imagine the further awkwardness.

haha. i need to stop getting into these pensive moods all the time. i guess i think too much when i'm alone. i need to get out more often...

olly!! lend me your guitar!!1!

[add-on]
sorry! electrico does have an official website.. it just wasnt google-listed.

now thats better! give local gigs more credit.. well, at least those who deserve it.. not like sylvester, who cant sing; or other artistes who run off to other countries to start their careers there, coz got "bigger market". quitters. =P

paint the silence

2004-12-01T13:54:00.000+08:00

havent blogged for a long time. mainly because i went to holiday in malaysia with family. which happened to be very dumb. went to cameron highlands first, where we didnt do anything much except look at strawberry farms and bees and weird stuff. quite boring, but liked the climate there. very dry and cool.
anyways. then went to genting for only 1 day. but it was raining, so i couldnt go for the outdoor theme park thing. boo. bought tickets some more, so wasted.
oh yea. the only cool eventful thing that happened was that there was a car accident along the highway from cameron to genting. we went in a convoy you see, and since we were ahead somewhere, we didnt see the accident itself. but apparently the car skidded on the wet road (driver didnt shift gear downhill) and flipped over. like totally turned turtle. but it flipped itself back up again. no casualties, just a few scratchs. wow.

so anyway. i got back on monday, but didnt blog about it. too tired. and the many stuff that was put on hold all of a sudden seemed very urgent. crap. coz of the holiday i missed my prof test. shit. now i have to do it next year. like my spec course. how dumb. shit.
and i was too depressed to return to choir. purposely slept in on tuesday, but then found out that night that was to be no choir at all until 13th Dec. which is right after my birthday (hint hint). oh no. we're performing on the 20th and we only have 1 week?? thats crazy.

sigh whatever. what a rushed entry. anyway. am enjoying the relative peacefulness at home. sorry to those peopel who asked me to go out and i didnt reply the sms. too tired.

sigh. anyway. this is a very nice song by a very unknown band. its in the OC Soundtrack Mix 1. nice song. very "alternative" sounding. grows on you. trust me. i liked the scene where they played the song in the show too. sigh.

South - Paint The Silence
Don't paint the silence black now save me
Don't leave it a day
You got a right to stand or die so maybe
You take chances all the same
Pain comes in stages
If we dont make it
Nothing changes

so happy together

2004-11-21T23:52:00.000+08:00

sigh. i tried, justin...

anyway. the misunderstanding, has in my eyes, changed abit. well, lets just say the incident was just a small spark, and the real problem is the gas that has been filling for the past year already. does that make sense? erm well, its like tension that has been going on for a long time, and the small incident creating a huge fuss.

well, aftermuch pensive reflections, ive made up my mind. im tired of the person's different sides and faces. how you can be so nice and then so vicious in such a short time? not sure if it's just a very quick change of mind, or clever backstabbing. ill give you the benefit of the doubt, and either way, i'll still treat you as a friend. but after all that stuff, im not so sure if i can trust you anymore.

sigh. im actually quite glad the incident happened, in a way. if not i wouldnt have known the many different sides of the people around me. after this entire fiasco, i have utmost respect for some people, and also know my real true friends. conversely, i have lost all trust in some people.

oh well. i sound too serious, dont i? well, its over liaoo.

well. choir dinner was great. didnt eat much though.. and i paid $65++ for it, coz we had to pay for seniors too. what a waste. games were fun. great to see the seniors again. (but prob for the last time for many =( sniff sniff) the sec 3 item was dabomb. (i think) great job guys!

me and you, and you and me
no matter how toss the dice
it had to be
the only one for me is you
and you for me
so happy together..

well. ok. super tired now. bye.

the middle

2004-11-18T21:02:00.000+08:00

Hey, don't write yourself off yet
It's only in your head you feel left out or
looked down on.
Just try your best, try everything you can.
And don't you worry what they tell themselves when you're away.

sigh. feel so crappy

i cant believe i was so stupid. i just shot my mouth off without thinking... and without considering anything the other person was going through.
senior's farewell dinner up in 3 days and everyone's frazzled. but still, it doesnt really give me any excuse to have a row with someone without the real facts. so ive offended the person pretty badly and had a terrible time today.

sigh. nevermind. whats past is past.

anyways. sec 3 item for the dinner is coming along beautifully. haha.. to all the seniors who said we lacked the cohesiveness and unity to perform a chamber piece by ourselves, HA! we did it for the first time without any external help. we spent hours in front of the piano coming up with an acapella version of So Happy Together (the Heineken - Jennifer Aniston Ad song) from scratch.. and we're doing very well considering we only started rehearsing this week.

and if time permits, we might help the sec2s with their song. yay.

Hey, you know they're all the same.
You know you're doing better on your own, so don't buy in.
Live right now.
Yeah, just be yourself.
It doesn't matter if it's good enough for someone else.

the middle - jimmy eat world

only one

2004-11-16T20:51:00.000+08:00

whee. one reason i like this new blog is because i get to add titles. haha.
the other reason is because bindingblues.blogspot is alliteration! lol..

anyways. "only one" is the title of a yellowcard song (sense a pattern yet?) ownage song. rock band + electric violinist. wow. impressive.

AHHHHH. found out 10 minutes ago that TODAY was my NCC PROF TEST!!! and i ddint know about it, hence i PONNED IT. shit no! this is spec course dejavu all over again. (would like to refer to that incident written on my previous blog, but its deleted).. so i freaked out, scared i would get the ol' demerit treatment from liang again (evil old man).

and all the people i called to ncc wouldnt pick up (gah.), so in my moment of desperation i called Gareth...... who was surprisingly rather nice, reassuring me that i wouldnt be screwed, that i should call fish another time, and go for the second round on 25th.

i think i should be nicer to gareth from now on..

anyways. taiwan ppl are online! (well, now).
talking to them now, catching up and all. going to all of them online asking hows taiwan and all. turns out general consensus is that its boring... please. 1 month! lotsa time for fun. now im just sad, coz i know if i went, i would have loads of fun! lol well...

Only One - Yellowcard
Broken this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason

I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you so you know
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one

Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone

And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only my only one

Here I go so dishonestly
Leave a note for you my only one
And I know you can see right through me
So let me go and you will find someone

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one, no one like you
You are my only, my only one
My only one
My only one
My only one
You are my only, my only one

the night the lights went out

2004-11-15T19:52:00.000+08:00

well.. not literally. its the title of a really nice song by The Ataris. mmm.

to fish and ian lin: w00t? forgotten all my malay, except for selamat hari raya!
and thx cow! i like it too..

well today, we went sam chan's place to pay him a visit. been quite a while since we last did so, coz of exams and all. he looks fine, cept a little thin. otherwise, same sam inside out.. we also went for a belated birthday thing. bought a Sara Lee choc pound cake, and bdae candles from 7-11..haha.. then we ate lunch at his house... haha. killer laksa. neh-neh-nail couldnt finish!

then played muchkin with uber expansions. wah, HENRY won. then we all played worms! world pary i think. won one game, by turtling a single half health worm.. but lost the second one to Henry again, when it was sudden death (me and henry all 1 health) and had a very anticimatic death of friction against the ground...

haha.. anyways. sam looks fine. despite all the chemo, he's still quite the same.. sigh.

BTW. nehnehnail is now N^3 or Triple N or NNN.. hha.. so lame.

and yea! got a haircut, which i finally for once like! go me..

The Night The Lights Went Out In NYC - The Ataris
The lights are out in the
city tonight
So close your eyes, gaze up at the heavens
And see if you
can point me out

If I could have one wish tonight
I'd wish upon a
satellite
To bring me back to you
We spend our whole lives searching for
All the things we think we want
And never really knowing what we have

now here is nowhere

2004-11-14T11:58:00.000+08:00

new blog! not exactly new. this blog seems like a continuation of my previous one more than any.
why new blog? well, because song deleted the previous one *dirty look*. i know i said it was my last post, but i didnt mean delete the whole thing! nvm. i never liked the previous blog name anyway.

anyways. its close to the end of 2004. this has been the fastest year ever... sec 3 passed by, with me almost realising it too late. new friends, closer friends and great memories. my views on many things have changed alot too. despite 2004 being the most screwed up year academically (i dun mean me who screwed up. i mean the entire system), i must say this year is the most enjoyable. =P nostalgia... sniff sniff.

and yay! holidays! watched a total of 4 movies since school closed. youch... my wallet...
have lots planned, but judging from past holiday experiences, dun think i can accomplish much. haha.. many personal goals, and CCA commitments.
choir is slowly suffocating me, but im still holding out. im sure it will turn for the better. OM is crazzzy! this is so much diff from when we first attempted it in sec 2. we got a cool group, we're gonna make it!
so much for holidays being relaxing. right now just treating it as a challenge. ive never given up on one before, and im not about to.

gross. what an ugly and unoriginal template. going to come up with one asap. but i dun think there will be much time, since i have to design the choir website too! i must say its coming along very nicely =)
so yea. a new beginning, amongst many others...

now here is nowhere... haha. so cool right? like it alot. chanced upon it while surfing the net.. its the name of a new album by some unknown band (secret machines i think).